I Love Tacky: Lawn Flamingos

Irresistible

When does a lawn flamingo seem crazy? Maybe the better question is when doesn't it seem crazy. Perhaps they seem impractical when you don't have an actual lawn. But I wasn't going to let a little thing like not having a lawn deter me from these bad boys.

This weekend I passed these old school flamingos and fell in love. It was reminiscent of the moment I saw my purple purse and knew we were meant to have fun times together. The logical side of me was debating whether I really needed lawn flamingos when I had no lawn nor really a good place to put them. Then I realized that Chef has three small fruit trees so it seemed like a silly thing like land ownership wasn't something that stopped our family from things we want.

I took them up to get a price check and found out they were $12.99. A mere pittance for not one BUT TWO plastic pink flamingos. It was about this time when I saw this on the side of the box and it sealed the deal.

All I need for happiness and fun are pink flamingos? Yeah, that seems about right.

In an homage to Three's Company, I've decided to name them Jack Tripper and Chrissy Snow (no one really liked Janet anyway). If you can persuade me otherwise, I might dub them something else (I've already dubbed them Unforgiven).

Jack and Chrissy and Genghis

From Christmas Past: Oregon Street

For years when I lived in or around Evansville, I would make an annual pilgrimage to the best, tackiest, most over the top display of Christmas decorations that I have ever seen in person anywhere.

Growing up in Big Vin City of Sin (aka Vincennes, IN) I was accustomed to large Christmas displays. A local doctor had life-size moving exhibits of Santa in his workshop, checking his list, etc on his front lawn. The year I learned to read, I figured out that my brother's name (Matthew) was on Santa's list on one of the exhibits but mine wasn't. I cried. My dad called the guy and two nights later my name was on the list. The decorations are long gone, but the memory remains.

After that, I didn't think Christmas decorations could be topped. Until my friends Brooke and Lara introduced me to Oregon Street. This was YEARS before people really knew. We used to drive by late at night and a couple of times got to talk to the guy who did this every year. He started out with one home with a free lot and then the display grew so much he had to buy the house across the street to house the decorations. Of course, that also gave him another yard to decorate. He mentioned that people would just leave that year's latest decorations on his doorstep with notes of goodwill.

The girls and I loved this place. We even exchanged Christmas presents outside the display. In years when we were apart for Christmas, I would take the gifts they had sent to Oregon Street and open them there on my own. It just made my holiday brighter.

So in an effort to make your holiday brighter, and to give you a baseline of the type of Christmas extravagance I've come to expect out of life, here's a video done a few years ago and posted by the Evansville Courier & Press.

You're welcome.

I Found My Tacky

I went to Walgreen's today during my lunch break to grab a few things and thought that it would be a good place to search for #8 on my Holiday Spirit Quest list:

Buy something tacky just because its seasonal.

I knew Walgreen's wouldn't let me down and boy, they didn't. There were a few things to choose from until I saw it. The one item that screamed to me "YOU MUST BUY ME!". The rejected items that I've seen that were almost, but not quite, tacky enough were:

• A Christmas carol singing Sock Monkey
• A dancing Christmas tree (felt a little 1992)
• The leg lamp from A Christmas Story (been done before--a lot)
• Mickey Mouse ears with a Santa Hat headband (didn't want to wear the tacky--just admire it from afar)
• Two coconut balls that were packaged together as "Frosty's balls" (tacky but it was edible and not something for display)

While all those did scream to me, the winner was this:

Yes, that is a Snooki Christmas ornament. I debated on whether to get Snooki or The Situation and settled on her because her ornament looks least like her actual self plus there's a giant butt on her that has "Made in China" imprinted on it. 

Look closely for the Made in China.

It made me chuckle. Clearly, I couldn't get a J-Wow or Pauli D ornament (which they also had) because we all know they won't have the longevity that the Snooki has. 

And to help spread the tacky Christmas cheer, I'm going to put the names of some of my closest friends in a hat and draw out one to send this lovely ornament to after the holidays. You're welcome in advance.

Can you out tacky me? I double dog DARE you!