My Vanity: My Hair

Post roller time

The older I get, the more I come to realize that most reasonable people hated high school. And that most people going through high school or middle school were going through some sort of serious trauma that they hid from other people. I say this because I've talked with people I've gone to high school with (or at least those who I didn't remain close with in college) and found out they were going through stuff I had no idea about. Teasing, divorce counselling, taking lunch at home. All kinds of things I was too wrapped up in myself to see. 

But thinking of all that, I also look back to see what did I do to keep my shit together. Mostly I suffered from an odd case of having no or low self-esteem but exceptionally high self-respect. Meaning my overall pictures of myself wasn't great--mostly due to my weight issues, but I knew enough to know that I was smart and that counted for a lot in my book. And when I was having my ugly days, there was one thing that my mom did for me that still makes me smile: she introduced me to the kindness of hot rollers. 

One side of my hair holds curl
better than the other.
Anyone else have that?

My mom did other things, like constant reinforcement of my intelligence and the importance of that, but sometimes a girl needs to feel pretty. And was during one of those moments in need that my mom bust out her big old set of hot rollers and went to town. She would tell me how pretty my hair was and how she was excited that she had passed that down to me. And to this day, when I'm in the need to feel pretty about myself, I wrap my hair up in those hard plastic rollers and sweat it out until I'm left with bouncy curls and happiness. Luckily, I do not have to do that every day as I did in high school (and well into college), but every now and again, it's a nice reminder. 

It was these moments that helped me realize how hard it was for my mother to lose her hair during chemo. She never intentionally let my stepdad see her without a wig or other head covering because of it. But I knew what was bothering her--her secret weapon was gone and there was no easy way to get it back. She handled most things silently but she was pretty vocal about losing her hair. I would be too.

It is my go-to vanity. And there when I needed it most. And if it ever comes to losing my hair, I'll invest in a damn good wig--that I can hot roller.

Red on the Head, but not on the Toe Nail

Today was the big hair change day. I earned the day by successfully losing 10 pounds in 2 months and I was darn sure going to take advantage of this reward. I decided to go red and to get some updated look to my style. Honestly, with the exception of a cute short cut with some side swept bangs that I had two years ago, my hair has been pretty much the same. Long layers framing the fame. And until 6 months ago, it was always a varying shade of blonde. The brunette was fun and I may certainly go back, but if I was going to throw down some dollars to get my hair done (instead of the Nice 'n Easy and Supercuts route that I normally take), I was going to take advantage of it.

I went to a woman that Chef walked in to a few weeks back. She did such a good job on his hair that I went ahead and made the appointment with her. She listened to me when I told her I had ideas of what I wanted, but I also knew my limitations (like that I don't do the whole round brush, hairdryer thing). She made some tweaks and suggestions and then just went to town.

The one thing I'll say bad about the experience wasn't so much her fault, but a product of the salon she works in. I had an appointment and I knew that it was going to take a while to get what I wanted, but her salon had booked at least three other cuts with her during the time I was there. So I had to wait to have rinses or her assistant had to blowdry me. It took 3 hours.

I know that they absolutely have to have her attending to other clients. I totally get that. What I wish was that they had a contingency for people like me. Clearly I was spending a lot of money there and should have been the priority for service over a $20 haircut. Just sayin'. Am I out of touch?

Anyway, I got the cut and strutted around the mall (looking for a short, white dress for our courthouse wedding--found nothing) and I noticed that I got a lot more looks than normal. Maybe it was the red hair (which looks more natural than I thought it would--clearly NOT natural, but not a blatant accost of nature) or the bangs, but I felt more stylish and confident. And I got three compliments on the color in the first hour I had it. Not too shabby.

Got home and Chef had a good reaction. He likes me feeling good about myself and values that above all other things when it comes to my appearance. He also commented that I should change things up every 6 months to a year. I agree that it's been fun to be a little different.

After I got home, what I had been hoping for and dreading happened: my toe nail fell off. I know it's gross and I was not excited about it, but I was also happy because my toe nail had been sliding into my nail bed all day when I was walking and that was causing me more discomfort than just ripping the stupid thing off.

So I got home and examined it and it was hanging on by one small place. Some finagling and BAM. I'm now sporting a fleshy area that has tender skin and a tiny little nail that had started growing. The only thing that pisses me off is that I literally had the toe accident on the day we moved in to our apartment and it is only JUST now coming off. Didn't come off when it was swollen so badly that the nail turned purple and it hurt to walk. Didn't come off when I got an infection and the toe turned black. Waiting until it appeared the nail would stay before coming loose. Bastard toe nail.

At least now I can wait a few weeks and get a pedicure without shame or fear.