Least Shocking News of the Football Season

Who saw this coming? (Um, everybody including me). Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler broke up. He called it off, but not before their wedding registry and a photo shoot of her modelling wedding dresses were already made public. Perhaps Hollywood could learn a thing or two about long engagements.

My favorite things about this are as follows:

1. TMZ calling the wedding dress photo shoot pictures TRAGIC and SAD. Showing a kid a burnt down house and telling him its Disneyland is sad (Thanks, Jack Handy). What happened in Norway is tragic. This is just bad timing and poor planning.
2. You could tell from the registry that it wasn't going to work. Too many items to make baked goods in (muffin pans, cookie sheets). Dude has diabetes. Ask for the salad spinner. Just saying.
3. Sports Pages are following this. I always knew that sports were men's version of gossip pages, but when the two intersect, it not only reaffirms it, but it's glorious.

At least Kate Bosworth and Alexander Skarsgard breaking up can take some of the heat off them.

A Reality Star and A Football Player? Really?

Normally, I don't give a rat's ass who gets engaged to who. Okay, maybe I care a little. But when it's a reality TV star, I typically don't care at all. However when that reality TV star gets engaged to an NFL player that grew up near where I did and played college football in the town I lived when I lived there, I care a little more.

And that's why I'm perplexed at the engagement of Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler. Really? A chick that got her fame from drinking to excess and pretending to be a plotting manipulative bitch (in reality she probably was a plotting manipulative bitch, but she was one in high school and frankly, who wasn't?). How much, aside from notoriety, could they possibly have in common?

I mean, I really don't see Kristin Cavallari chowing down on some barbecue at Judge Bean's in Nashville. I also have a hard time seeing her pick up the phone at a Wilford Brimley 'betes testing supply commercial as she remembered to reorder Jay's strips. Or learning to cook without sugar.

Will Jay now have to buy a line of clothing she designs to movie premiere? I also question their publicist. Seriously? Why did you announce any wedding news this week when the world is only hearing the words "William and Kate"? Wait a week and let your engagement bask in the post-matrimonial after glow of the royals.

The one thing I'll give her was that she was smart enough to say yes to a Tosh.0 guest appearance.

Just sayin'.