Never Quite Perfect

This pre-made Gingerbread house may
look normal, but the fail sauce is in
the massive amounts of icing that
is pooled in the inside because of my
ineptitude. 

I knew when I was about 12 years old that I would not be the type that could craft beautiful things and make it look effortless or make beautiful food that tasted delicious. I've never been the type of girl or woman that could just conjure up special. It's just not in me.

At least when it comes to those areas. I knew it at 13 when I was determined to make some chocolate cookies that I found the recipe to. We had nearly all the items and it seemed easy enough to just cover for the items I was missing. I was missing baking powder but decided to use baking soda instead and ended up with a puffy, sour tasting chocolate thing that my brother and mother both laughed at me for. And rightly so.

That one event has seems to have set the tone for the majority of my crafting/cooking life. I always end up missing something that is small, but has a certain role to play. I try to adjust or make do and it just ends up a disappointment. Mostly to me.

Could I possibly be the worst crafter in the world? Can I live my life in satisfaction if I cannot make one damn thing out of a Mason jar except a jar to hold things? Is my life empty if I do not own a set of rainbow-colored Sharpies, stencils or sponges used specifically for paint? I don't even own anything that has chalkboard paint on it.

I think I'll be able to live with it, but if you ever receive a handmade gift from me that isn't the written word, you just received a piece of my failure. Enjoy!

Failure or New Opportunity?

Birthday cupcakes (not all 6 but still)
definitely played into my downfall!

I hate failing. In fact, someone once said they thought I had a fear of it. Maybe I do, I'm not sure, but whether I fear it or not, I've certainly done my fair share. The latest failure: January's goals. Not all of them, but certainly my weight loss experiment with The Firm Express.

I have done every workout in the series. I did not, however, do them in the correct order or 3 times a week. I also blew off my diet for a few weeks. Argh. At one point, I had lost 7 pounds during the month due to the exercise and since put about half of it back on. That's what I get for indulging in birthday, Superbowl and Valentine's day celebrations. And mostly just not paying attention to what I was eating well enough.

I heard a stat once that said it took the average person six attempts to quit smoking. I think that number is probably double or triple for lifestyle changes. So instead of wallowing in misery or failure, I'm going to try again. And maybe this time I'll start wearing incredibly tight pants and belts to make myself uncomfortable enough to stop putting food in my face.

This week:

• Days per month that I worked on my novel: 15/15 (not sucking on this one!)
• Calories burned per week: 1550 (a pound is 3500)
• Weight loss/gain since last posted result: +3 lb.
• Cumulative loss/ gain: -3 lbs.

Last Night's Dinner Theme: I tried!

Maple glazed chicken
with Brussels sprouts slaw

Last night I cooked dinner again. I'm back to at least attempting to cook 3 times a week instead of being my usual lazy self. So, if you have any good places you go to for healthy recipes, let me know (And thanks, Misty, for reminding me about Cooking Light). So I've attempted two dishes this week, both with low levels of success. 


I made pumpkin ravioli with a light cheese sauce and hazelnuts on Sunday. It was actually not too bad, but just didn't have a lot of POP. I think the flavors were supposed to be subtle but ended up as bland. And it's a fine line between subtle and bland. Too fine a line for a cook like me. 


Last night was the meal pictured: Maple glazed chicken with Brussels sprout slaw. I found out a few things: 1) I love roasted Brussels Sprouts but I do NOT like raw ones. Even with a nice vinaigrette and dried cranberries. 2) That maple and red wine vinegar might smell like crap when reducing but don't taste too badly together. and 3) I still overcook chicken like nobody's business. I wish I wasn't afraid to give someone food poisoning, but I am.  And that makes me cook the shit out of things. The chicken was terribly overdone, but did need the steak knife for adequate slicing. 


Anyway, here's where I'm at:

• Pages of fiction read: 55% of a 400 page book (Mockingjay). So, that's technically 220 pages.
• Fiction read: Mockingjay. I'm going to be sad when it's over. 
• Fiction listened to via audiobook: None, but I just got the two final Stieg Larsson books because I can't seem to read them and the Confederacy of Dunces, because I've always wanted to read that, but never seem to remember.
• Five pages written: Yes!!! Still reworking a new beginning to the book. started a brand new section. I'm now up to 45 pages of NEW material in four weeks.
• Calorie tracking: Check. a whopping 281 calories OVER than my daily goal. Last week was not a good one. hence the new recipes, etc. 
• Exercise: 265 minutes of exercise in the last week. 
• Friends and family: Yup. A friend AND a family member got phone calls this week.  
• Weight Loss:0 lb (did you SEE the calorie overage? Of course I didn't lose weight!)
• One revised section of novel per week:  Check! Got about 8 pages of a transition to the main story.