Kittenz II Cats

Nothing says Christmas like dressing your cats up like tiny little members of the world's furriest boy band. I only have a few items left on my Holiday Spirit Quest and last night I took care of #7- Have the cats sporting their holiday ties at least once this holiday season. That means that I only have to watch a cheesy holiday movie (one of which is sitting on my bedroom DVR) and stuff a stocking (or two) which I (or Santa) will do tonight. I have to say that I still love doing these spirit items. Mostly because if I didn't, I wouldn't try at all to get into the holiday mood, and what fun is that?

So, today we also went to use the last of our flexible healthcare spending for the year and got glasses and contacts, as well as eye exams. This has become somewhat of a Christmas Eve tradition. We get exams, Chef gets glasses, we wait for the glasses by walking across the street to the mall. We did all that today PLUS had a delicious lunch at PF Chang's. It's not quite opening presents with the family, but it's not bad at all.

In the mean time, here are pictures of the furry family of boy band members (and Mila) in their holiday attire. Enjoy!

Attila looking dapper in his plaid tie.

Genghis and Khubla wondering how they could've worn the same outfit.

The closest I could get to having all three in the picture at once.

Genghis kinda likes his tie.

Genghis and his half-brother Attila looking very much like they are ready for their holiday choir concert.

Genghis and Khubla waiting for their cue to sing.

The best one of Khubla by himself

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Mila did not like her holiday fur collar AT ALL.

This was the most she would do with it. I can't blame her. It had bells so she couldn't hide at all from the other cats. 

Is this the furry face of a monster?

He looks all sweet and innocent, but deep down, this guy has a problem. An addiction or compulsion really and if he had the ability to understand me, I'd try an intervention on him. His addiction? Plastic.

I'd start with "Attila, your addiction to plastic has hurt me in the following ways:

You chew through plastic bags containing carb-laden food that I love. The holes you create then allow the others in your pack to pounce on the food inside leaving a nibbled, soggy mess.

If makes it impossible for us to leave out anything that crinkles and isn't a cat toy.

You have gone into my purse--my purse!-- and taken out plastic Ziplock baggies of tampons. Okay, I admit it. It's funny to see your furry, guilt-stricken face as you try to scamper off with the bag between your teeth."

Yesterday morning Chef said  "Honey, Attila left you a present out here." as I was getting up. Typically this means the occasional hairball or perhaps something coming out the other end, but that morning it was an actual tampon that he had nibbled through the top of the plastic wrapper of. He has a fascination with all feminine hygiene products. I know it's the plastic, but I also think they have a different smell that attracts him.

Weirdo. I guess until Jeff VanVonderan is available for cat interventions, I'll just have to be more protective of our plastic and my tampons.

A Thin Line Between Normal and Serial Killer

If I took Attila to the movies,
chance are he would just crawl
up next to me and sleep.
 Just sayin'

Yesterday, Chef and I went to see The Avengers, because we're American. And apparently all of America went to see it this weekend. Even in our beloved sinner showing, there was a fairly full house--and we chose to see it without 3D. Partly because I think that 3D is just a way for movie executives to test how stupid moviegoers will be to see a movie. I think the fact that they've made five versions of The Fast and The Furious should be enough of a case study, but I guess they want to fuck with us more because those glasses keep getting more and more hideous.

Hideous glasses aside, I also fear that 3D will end up corrupting versions of the movie and we'll look back in 20 years and laugh at what we thought was so advanced. Don't believe me? Catch Jaws 3 next time its on TV and see how stupid that shark looks coming at you. And how short shorts could be and still be considered acceptable. Dennis Quaid, I'm talking to you.

So we're sitting there in a relatively packed theater and a family comes to sit down after the previews have started. I actually like seeing the previews, but since Youtube means that I can watch the ones I'm interested in at home, I get a little less pissed off about people talking during them. What does piss me off, though, was the little shit behind me that felt the need to kick my chair for 20 minutes.

I know a lot of you have kids where I have cats, but I have no sympathy for a parent who is so engaged in a movie that you don't seem to notice the toddler (who shouldn't have been in that movie at all -completely inappropriate for that young of a kid) that was standing --not sitting in their seat--and kicking the back of a chair in front of them. An area that just happens to be my HEAD. At first I tried to pretend it was like a massage chair when I get my pedicures that had some how gone on the fritz, but it didn't work for long. I gave a few pointed looks to the mother behind me, but it didn't work. She never did do anything to control her child. I wondered why the kicking stopped but when I went to the bathroom I saw that the kid had fallen asleep in his chair. Mystery solved.

Cat Vomit and other fun stuff

Attila may vomit on our bed, but he is
definitely our best cuddle kitty. 

As far as emergencies go, Chef and I have thankfully been spared for the most part. However, there seems to be something about our comforter that says "Have a cat emergency HERE!". Mila took a crap right in the middle of it (while Chef and I were sleeping in the bed, no less) which got her banned from the bedroom for almost a year before she was allowed back in. And rightfully so. No one likes to wake up to the smell of feces.

Yesterday, Attila decided to vomit on my side of the comforter. The poor kitty has been vomiting up everything he's eaten for the last two days which means in our world means unplanned vet visit time! Hooray. I also got to see the inside of a lovely LA laundromat because our comforter is too big for our washers in the complex. Instead of brunch and mimosas, I had Diet Dr Pepper and a book while waiting for it to wash.

Anyway, hope he's better today. This is yet another reason that I may not be cut out for parenthood. Too many bodily fluids.

Kitty Prozac

It sucks being the only girl some time. I know because for a good while I was the only girl amongst a plethora of boy cousins. And while it had it's advantages (I got Air Jordans and camo one Christmas like the boys and LOVED IT), it also had some disadvantages.

It is in this spirit that I know that Mila has to be needing some feminine feline time. Not that we're getting another kitty any time soon, but she has been and continues to be skiddish. So much so that she's started thinking outside of the box. And by thinking, I mean pooping. There's no better start than waking up to the smell of god awful and having to pick it up by the handful (albeit a fully covered hand). And by better, I mean worse.

After a month of pretty consistent litter box aversion, we took Mila to an LA vet. The month was my fault. Chef asked me on several occasions to find a vet and make an appointment. This has always been one area that I've handled. What's tricky is finding a vet that has good word of mouth AND is in the vicinity AND is open on weekends (I work so far away that it doesn't work to trek Mila or any of our furry friends out this far). However, thank God for yelp, because it helped me find all three PLUS they even make house calls. How sweet is that??

We went on Saturday to see if there was anything physically wrong with Mila. Not only was the vet super nice and took his time explaining what could be the causes (and even ignored a pushy patient in the waiting room to do so), but he was also hot. Not that Chef really cares about that, but it was definitely a perk. And by hot, I mean several days worth of stubble on the face kind of hot. That impractical hot because you KNOW that stubble hurts like heck to get kissed from but it sure is nice to look at. (He was also married).

But I digress. From hotness to her highness, as apparently there's nothing physically wrong with Mila (which we breathed a sigh of relief about). She's just a nervous cat who gets harassed by the guys. We're trying homeopathic remedies and changing her diet before we go the medication route...which is PROZAC. They don't make a special kitty prozac so she would literally be getting the same thing as a human. Just less of it. That weirds me out a little.

After this news, we made a trip to the pet store and spent some hard earned cash on the kitties. It was time they all got an upgrade. A soothing diffuser to Mila, a water fountain for Khubla, a tunnel and new litter box for them all. They got hooked up.

Not only that, but Chef has even allowed two of them re-entry into our bedroom at night: Mila (because she's skiddish and gets picked on A LOT at night) and Attila (because Mila cries very loudly if he's not in there with her). So far, so good. A few nights in and she's already using the litter box again. We'll see how long this lasts. . .

Vacation Day Eight: Rest and Recovery

Some of you out there might've noticed that vacation day seven did not get chronicled. Frankly, that was poor planning on my part. Yesterday was Chef's birthday and we while we had done the eating celebration at Ruth's Chris, we did the drinking celebration at The Patterson House last night. We left earlier than I anticipated and therefore didn't get a blog entry off before the celebrating began.

And the celebrating was nice. We got to taste the spring menu of cocktails (the favorite of the ones I sampled was the Hush and Wonder--fruity but delicious) before they change it up for the summer. Chef had a drink that was also delicious and the best way to describe it was like drinking liquid cinnamon teddy grahams. I only got a taste, but it was one of the best drinks I've ever had.

We had taken a cab there, but decided to walk home--I had missed boot camp for his birthday so it was probably a good idea to get some exercise. However, about halfway home (it's only a little over a mile), we were regretting the decision. I need another pedicure because my feet are now once again crusty. It was hot last night.

It was a great celebration and a great way to cap off a week of being off. The dread for Monday's barrage of things to do is slowly creeping in. But for today, I am being productive in a domestic sense. I did the grocery shopping and have four loads of laundry in various stages.

I also am soaking up the last moments of cat snuggling. Particularly with Attila. He's my snuggle buddy normally, but we've had more time this week. I think he's going to take it hard when I go back to work. Or maybe I'm just pretending he'd take it hard to feel better about the fact that Genghis adores Chef so much.

So back to laundry. . .

My Turn to Wax Poetic About Cats

I was going to write about a different type of cat (a Tiger), but I looked at the calendar (which I SWORE was my nephew's birthday when in actuality it was yesterday--good thing the present was there on time) and realized today was a different kind of cat's day. Actually, it was two cats' day. One year ago today Chef and I adopted Mila and Attila.

It was kind of a fluke. I was on craigslist posting volunteer opportunities when I decided to check out the pet section. We had gotten Genghis a few months before and noticed his kitten tendencies were getting a little out of hand. "He's got only-kitten disease," we decided and were on the lookout for another kitten. The catch was that we had bought Genghis because we wanted a specific breed (the pixie bob). We didn't want to just get any old cat, but another pixie bob. And we didn't want to pay for another kitten that close to Christmas.

Well low and behold, I typed in "pixie bob" in the search area and came up with a hit. Someone in Columbia was giving away two pixie bobs to a good home because of allergies. It's a long story, but we ended up with them both. And soon Oliver and Olivia became Attila and Mila. I have typed in "pixie bob" randomly ever since and have yet to ever get a hit.

They were both so scared that they spent the first few days hiding behind the toilet. Mila then hid behind the headboard for a few more days. It took a good 3 months for them to warm up to us, but now it's all over. Attila flips on his back at the sight of us coming near in preparation for the belly rub he longs to get. And Mila just waits for one of us to lay on the couch so that she can hop on our chest and knead us with her little paws.

So far it has easily been my second best and luckiest find on the internet. The first, of course, being Chef.

How to Clean Up Cat Vomit

This is something Chef and I became experts on as two of the little angels were heaving like Linda Blair in The Exorcist this weekend. Nothing to worry about, but definitely little pools of vomit joy to clean up.

This was the first time that I regreted having more than one animal. Mostly because as soon as one was making that nasal wretching noise (cat owners, you know what I'm talking about) and we ran to try and pick him up to place the feline on a hard surface, then the other one would start wretching too.

Chef got the brunt of the vomiting clean up duty. Genghis and Attila were the infected kitties. So, we kept the clean up to a science:

1. Wet down spot


2. Mop up excess vomit


3. Spray with Complete Stain & Odor remover


4. Comment on how Complete only works about 75% of what I need it to do, making it really 75% and not nearly COMPLETE


5. Towel up wet spot


6. Repeat in 6-8 hours


7. Be thankful that the other two cats aren't sick


8. Wonder if the full body cat vomit spasm has pulled any of their kitty muscles

We've been vomit-free for almost 24 hours. Keep your fingers crossed!

I Thought We Got Cats. . .Not Dogs

Yup. It's going to be a quick cat blog. Mostly because one of our cats started doing something disturbing that had me thinking about all of our cats. We started with Genghis and soon enough all the cats were exhibiting dog-like behavior. Maybe all cats have similar traits, but I have yet to hear of it. Here goes:

• Genghis recognizes his name and comes when called.
  
• If Chef pats his legs, Genghis comes bounding across the room and hops into his lap to be pet.
  
• When you rub the couch or bed in a circular motion with your hand, Attila hops up and flops on his side. If you don't immediately start petting him, he then flips on his back and puts his paws in the air--like he's a true player.
• Lastly, because I know this list is getting boring. There's the issue of feminine hygiene products. Attila has an affinity for them. At first he just went into the trash and picked out whatever he could. Tampon, wrapper, pad, it didn't matter to him. So I started throwing them away in trash containers that were too high for him to stick his little snout into. Then he started going into my purse. It wasn't until all I saw was a tail sticking out of my bag that I realized he was digging in for my mobile stash of tampons. I zipped it up, but apparently I wasn't consistent because yesterday morning I woke up to a completely unwrapped unused tampon that had been carried through the house like a trophy. Maybe the string makes him think it's a mouse. Wait, he does that with pads too. Never mind. We're thinking of getting Attila counseling.
  

Vetin' Ain't Easy

On Friday, Chef and I took two of our cats to the vet. Mila and Attila got their first taste of shots, Nashville style. How that would differ from the style they got them in their old hometown, I'm not quite sure, but I like the sound of it better.

The thing about the vet is that we try to hide our cat mania to a certain extent. We don't tend to gush too much or elaborate about their personalities, but instead come prepared with intelligent questions. This time went much better than the last time, that's for sure.

The last time we visited the vet, we got a vet who we were told loved cats. Being that Genghis is a Pixie Bob and polydactyl, he tends to get a lot of attention. We had come in for shots and decided against getting one of them. When I was explaining our position to the vet, she was appalled that we would rather take our advice from many testimonials than her veterinary education and year or so of practice. I told her that I would take her advice if she did a little research on our breed of cat before making a recommendation, but that just pissed her off more. It was a showdown the likes of which I'm sure will be repeated in doctor's offices for our future children. Needless to say, we have a different vet within the same clinic now.

The cats are healthy and thriving. And we got a solution that seems to be working for Mila's poop problem. Nothing says love like clenaing up piles of turds from carpet. At least the carpet is brown too.