But I Really Want That Brownie. . .and iPad and Shoes...

A "lava stone"--one of my
guilty pleasures. It's a fried ball
of rice with avocado, spicy tuna,
and some caviar.
It's pretty damn good.

I'm having a hard time denying myself lately. And while that means food most of the time, it also means anything my heart is desiring at this moment. (And to be honest today I'm desiring a trip to Vegas or Nashville or Indianapolis or anywhere my friends are that I can be away from the work world for a few days). Most of the time my bank account severely limits my ability to follow through on my desires, but I got my tax refund back so I have a little money to play with. And by "play", I mean go into an Apple store on Friday during my lunch break and buy a new iPad.

The iPad, by the way, was not only a fairly impulsive (at least for me) purchase, but I bought a nice red case and felt absolutely no guilt about it. That doesn't usually happen. If I ever actually get to the point of pulling the trigger on a purchase, I usually regret it until I convince myself that I needed the item. (Like I needed the iPad because I was more likely to write if I could type away on it without having to open a laptop off and burn my legs--and no, my iPad has yet to burn my legs).

For the food front, I've been eating like there's no tomorrow. Well, not really, but it kind of feels that way. And it's a vicious cycle. I try on clothes that I can't fit in to, get depressed that I can't fit into them and then console myself with a cookie. Or a side of fries instead of salad. And while a few of these choices can be a good thing, I'm making them all the time and my ass is paying the price. I know better. I know I know better. But it still happens.

So, for a while I'm going to stick to trying on shoes and getting back to making good choices. I should probably go all-out psycho strict on this for a while before I loosen up. Hope I'm up for it.