Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Oprah's Got Nothing on Me (Except a Couple Billion Dollars and a Fame)

Okay, so I promised it in an earlier edition and I'm sure no one even remembers that I promised to make a little list of my favorite things a la the Winfrey-ed One.

Things that Don't Suck
  • Subway Chicken Bacon Ranch Toasted Subs - I'm not sucking up to Jared, they really are that good. I also like marveling at the convection oven that toasts and melts things to perfection in only 20 seconds. I want one.
  • Heath Magic Shell Once only available at the DQ, now near your grocer's freezer. If heaven is chocolate coated, they're using this to do it.
  • The Cream N Crimson Pizza from Aver's Nearly entirely at fault for my freshman 15 and a good way that I got to laugh at my family. ("SEE?!!?! Potatoes, Bacon, cheese and alfredo do make a great pizza!")
  • The Braun Oral B Toothbrush Truly the only thing that gets me to lick my teeth for 10 minutes on end.
  • TiVo If you aren't a part of the TiVolution, then you should be. There's a reason why everyone raves about it. It's like have your own channel and filling it with Little House on the Prairie and Gilmore Girls episodes. If you like that kind of thing.
  • Patrick's Spinach Artichoke Dip If you are lucky enough to meet Patrick and don't ask him to make the Spinach Artichoke Dip, then you doing yourself harm. It's not him. It's you.
  • Scooby Doo pajama Pants The fact that Lara remembered that I wanted to make Scooby Doo pants FIVE YEARS after I mentioned it and actually made them make these the most comfortable thing in the world.
  • That Kim is gone on '24' I don't care that they tried to make her hair look sassy in the second season or made her a badass CTU agent last season. Her character sucked and always had to be rescued from something.
  • Kaitlyn in Pigtails Fine, you don't know Kaitlyn. But I can assure you that she's the cutest thing in the world and adding pigtails only makes her cuter.

That's it for now. Yes, there's a lot of food on there, but you've met me. You know I'm a great lover of all things edible. Give me a break already!


swampette said...

Ah, the Cream & Crimson. You sad bitches can't get it anymore, but let me assure you that it hasn't lost its appeal. I can't believe we got through three years of school without ever having discovered it. Mad props to Swampy for sucking at bowling.

swampette said...

Oh, and Schultz? Get a Tivo. Seriously. It's...well...an indescribable thing of beauty.

swampette said...

I'm not done yet!!

Ashley, my Mentadent could kick your Oral B's ASS.

IDroppedYourMentadentToothBrushInTheToilet said...

Whatever. Get over it.

Ashley said...

Does your Mentadent move as if independent from your body? I thought not.

Precious Schultz said...

Dude, I have to say that I'm slightly surprised at what I found on your list. I guess I expected something a little more.... College Books. hmmmm.

Ashley said...

I've got a live version now that works quite nicely.


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