Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Rampages are so 5 years ago

Okay, so the school shooting in Minnesota is a sad, sad event, but did anyone else notice that there has been only one picture of the kid released and it was when he was 8 years old? Perhaps the kid was on to something with his feelings of not being loved if no one bothered to take his picture in the last 8 years?!?!?! I'd feel pretty pissed and want to be a Nazi too, because at least the Nazis take pictures for their ID cards.

I thought that school shootings were passe, but I guess not. I figured once Marilyn Manson was blamed, Michael Moore did a documentary on it and the very special anniversary programs for the Columbine shooting aired that kids would realize that shooting up their classmates in a rampage wasn't the cool thing to do anymore.

Let me talk to those who still have angst:
Haven't you seen any number of high school high-jinx movies out there? The cool way to get back at classmates for picking on you is to get pictures of them naked or performing strip teases on spring break and using your wide knowledge of technology from all those years in the AV club to your advantage. First, you can hide the footage as an "Easter Egg" on the new-fangled DVD yearbooks. Second, you can add the footage to the school's web site. And third, you can make a shit-talking web site that exposes those of power in your school.

See? It's easy to take out your frustration on the upper social class without using a semi-automatic to do the talking. Get creative. Watch 'Mean Girls' a few more times and learn to let your hate out in a better way. Start smoking-that's an easy and rebellious way to make friends in high school. Rent 'Heathers' and dream of murder. Become really creepy and have people refer to you as the girls from "The Craft." Whatever works for you.

School rampages are so 2000. Be creative. No bombs or mass suicide. Humiliation is the way to go.

1 comment:

Shera, Princess of Power said...

Bomb threats were all the rage at High School Greyskull... until they realized that federalis would hunt their asses down and arrest them. Especially the ones who were dumb enough to use thier OWN CELL PHONES. World's Dumbest Criminals, e'r body.
PS I can't get to the Precious Blog. Somebody send me a link.


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