Why I Hate My Apartment Complex

It started with a call around noon. My apartment complext called my personal cell phone and it went a little something like this:

"Hello, Ashley? This is Chastity from Westmont apartments. I'm calling to see why you haven't paid your rent this month."

Me: We paid our rent this month.

C: I'm showing that your rent was due on the first and you haven't paid it.

Me (scrambling to my computer to fervishly sign in to my online banking): Hold on for a second. Actually, I did pay. My bank account shows that you all cashed my check on August 4th for the amount of XXX. The account number on the back of the check that you endorsed is XXXXXX.

C: Oh, it's not showing up in our system. There must be a computer error that shows your rent being due twice in a month. I'll call IT and have them fix it.

End of phone call.

As I was sitting there with my hear pounding, I started to get fired up. We have never been late in paying our rent in the 6 years that Chef and I have lived together. Six years in one place. Never late. But the company calls us 16 days past the rent day and 12 days after the late fee day to accuse us of not paying. And there's no "I'm so sorry for this" or any kind of apology. Nothing. So now I'm fired up and I can't let it go. So I wait two hours and then call her back to express how disappointed I was in how the situation was handled and it just made it worse. Here's how that conversation went:

C:Westmont Properties, this is Chastity.

Me: Chastity, this is Ashley LAST NAME calling in regards to my rent payment.

C: Now which apartment are you in again? I've made a lot of calls today.

Me: Apartment XXX in XXXX complex.

C: Oh, right with the computer error.

Me: Yes, that was me. I was just calling to let you know that I'm disappointed in how the situation was handled.

C: Excuse me?

Me: I know that you are probably making a lot of calls concerning late rent but I am hurt that we've been tenants for more than 6 years, hadn't missed a payment and weren't treated better.

C: I don't know what to say. I mean, I said I was sorry. It was a computer error. And, you say that I make a lot of late rent calls, but I really don't. So I don't know what you want me to say.

Me: Actually, you didn't say you were sorry. That's why I was calling you back.

C: Well, I am sorry and now I've said it three times in this call.

Me: I'm disappointed in the manner and tone with which you made the call.

C: I am honestly shocked because I didn't have any tone with your call. It was a computer error and we fixed it. I'm sorry. What more do you want? I didn't yell or scream or anything.

Me: I'm hoping you wouldn't ever yell or scream at a tenant. I guess I wanted a little courtesy for having paid consistently on time and for an apology.

C: I've said I'm sorry.

Me: Fine. Goodbye.

C: Goodbye.

The above is why we will not be renewing our lease at this place. And why if you rent in Nashville, I would NOT recommend any place managed by Westmont Properties.

I Never Thought I was THAT Girl

But apparently I am. Last night my cruelty reached an all-time peak with Chef. He was actually a good sport about it, but I'm still feeling incredibly guilty. I turned into THAT girl. The one who made her boyfriend watch Lifetime Television for Women. And not just for Project Runway. I don't feel the least bit guilty about that pleasure as everyone should watch and adore Tim Gunn.

It was a Lifetime Made for TV movie. One that I'm a sucker for. Mostly because it was about a chunky girl who's a writer who lost weight and what happened after that. Not that that's a whole lot like my life as I didn't make up a fake personality, write a book, or get to wear a fabulous pair of Christian Louboutins. Nor did I meet a man who loved me only after I lost weight. I met one who loved me either way. And he also loved me while watching the end of a Lifetime Made for TV movie. God bless him.

In my defense, I do watch ESPN WAY more than Lifetime. At least an 8 to one ratio. If I'm being conservative. More like 10 to one during football season. I'm just saying. . .

And He Took a Turn Towards the Ben Seaver

When I first pondered this the other day, I didn't realize that the actor in question was from Indiana. It almost seems sacreligious to poke fun, but at the same point, I can't pull my punches just because someone was born in the same geographic area that I was.

So, here goes. I wondered what the hell happened to the kid from Star Wars: Phantom Menace. The one who had to play Darth Vader as a kid. The second most hated character after Jar Jar Binks. It has less to do with Star Wars and more to do with the. . .did that kid die or what?

Well, he's still alive. Not working so much, but it seems like he pulled a Ben Seaver. It happens. You're a cute kid, but that doesn't necessarily translate into an attractive adult. I mean, the jury's still out on Dakota Fanning, but I'm leaning towards her making it. Jake Lloyd (aka Darth Vader) seems like he's more on the Ben Seaver end of the scale than Justin Timberlake.

Am I wrong?

It's 10 Seconds and It Makes Me Laugh for WAY longer

Tosh.0 aired their usual viewer video and it cracked me up. And just thinking about it continues to crack me up. So I thought I'd share the simplistic genius of Invisible Engine and the 10 seconds that split my sides. Enjoy! My gift to you.

Attack of the Tacky

I have never been a girly girl. I have never considered myself exceptionally high maintenance. But nothing will change that perception faster than a trip to Gatlinburg.

I had never been to Pigeon Forge, Gatlinburg, Dollywood or anything in that area. Not that I hadn't wondered about it, but Tennessee wasn't the normal destination for vacations in Indiana. I had a few trips to Nashville, but other than that, it was mostly Indianapolis, Florida or the grandparents houses. We had the extra special trip to the Cayman Islands too, and a trip to Myrtle Beach, but I digress.

So I didn't know exactly what to expect. And Gatlinburg was beyond my expectations. I went with two of my chicks for a quick girls' trip. Had we gone for a mountain retreat, the experience might've been different. But probably not better. I love the tacky. It gave me fuel for the snarky comments for the entire time I was there PLUS a blog entry and some good stories.

So we had a great hotel (thanks, Jules!) and after the 6 hour trip (normally 4, but the traffic made it like Spring Break '94), we got dolled up for a night on the town. The recommended watering holes were a brewery that was owned by Calhoun's and the TGIFriday's. Not a great sign.

My favorite points of the trip were the crowded streets with families where at least one teenager looked mortified and parents were determined to make some memories, dammit. There was a plethora of options for miniature golf, ziplines and dinner shows. But places that stayed open past 1 a.m.--not so much.

The best part of the trip was the time with the girls. But that's often the case, isn't it? The company makes the trip.

Mistakes I've Made This Week

While the mistakes I've made this week are numerous and probably a little long to list, I thought I'd take a stab at it while enduring my latest mistake. Here goes:

• Planning on making lasagna on Boot Camp night. I didn't get home until 6:30 and after a shower and prep work PLUS the time it takes to cook the lasagna. It's looking like it's gonna be nearly 9 p.m. before we eat.
• That leads to another mistake: not getting my morning or afternoon snacks. I was "too busy" and didn't eat lunch until 1:30, but that's not nearly late enough to sustain me until the lasagna's ready.
• Not getting a limoncello at Sole Mio on Tuesday when we were saying goodbye to Sue & Walt from writers group.
• Not picking up on the signals from a customer that I was getting the "I'm gonna pass you off because I don't want to directly tell you no."
• Daily freak outs over the amount of work that I have to do. It's a constant. The only thing I can do is change my approach to how I see it.
• Being too transparent and not transparent enough.
• The second glass of wine at the baby shower--mostly for caloric reasons--and also because I get to be a smart ass as well.

So, not a bad list. I'm a little concerned that two of my mistakes included liquor, but that's a random week and not a common occurrence.

Maybe I'm Not So Interested in Amsterdam

Chef got us a series from a foreign TV station that highlights the nights of Amsterdam. It's not really dirty. Mostly just a matter of fact account of the business of sex--windows in the red light district, online escorts and on-stage sex acts. Without seeing anything, of course, but it's fascinating to see the interviews of the couple that perform 5 live sex shows together 6 nights a week. That just seems exhausting. The way they describe what they do is not at all romantic-clearly.

And clearly the government has their hands in things. There are taxes on the prostitutes and the windows. They also provide extra police to patrol the area--which averages 40 arrests a night. The two patrolman have a good sense of humor. They seem to be often intervening between sex worker and client. It has to be a little bizarre.

The whole show is a little weird, very interesting, not at all sexy and totally putting me off on visiting Amsterdam, although I'm sure it's very little. It just seems surreal.

Mad For Mad Men

When we last left them, the group from the former Sterling Cooper were starting their own ad agency. And Betty was leaving. And Don was having his secrets unravel. It's the perfect beginning for a new season. Now the question is going to be...when will the new season start? Not literally when. That's easy. AMC has been hyping tonight since Breaking Bad ended its season.

But when in history? Remember how they messed us all up by coming in mid-Kennedy administration and then assasination was near the end of this season after the end of the previous season highlighted the campaign and debates? The great thing about Mad Men is the antiquated way it showcases the workplace. Women as secretaries who are naive to the ways of the world. Only unmarried girls who actually worked. Drinking during a meeting. Smoking indoors. It's a throwback to a time that seems so foreign to the modern work environment. It also makes me wonder what the future will think of how we work now.

The other great thing about Mad Men, of course, is the fashion. It makes me want to break out my pencil skirts (or buy some) and flaunt my curves. The show's costume designer is launching her own line on QVC. I LOVE it. Hope I think about it and actually go back in September to check it out. I'm not a big QVC watcher (despite my heritage--Mom was a HUGE fan), but there's always the web site.

Anyway, here's hoping that tonight's premiere continues in the pattern of the show that we know and love. At the very least, I'd like to see Jon Hamm continue his career for a while and since they gave him hook hands on 30 Rock, my dream of him being Liz Lemon's husband is out of the question. However, she did take my superior dream of having Matt Damon as a boyfriend and make that real.

I love TV. Maybe too much.

"She Thought I Could Handle It THIS Time"

Chef called me over tonight so I could watch a video from my home state. It made me simultaneously laugh and cringe. Apparently a guy exactly my age was arrested in Indianapolis for child neglect---because while he was playing a video game, his two under 2 years old children wandered out into the apartment complex near a busy street.

I'm not enough of a snob to think that this scenario couldn't have easily been replicated in Tennessee--in fact, it probably has been. What immediately I thought of was a scene in the movie Idiocracy where it shows the fertility of a below average Joe compared to the very intelligent couple who wants to wait and then can't conceive. The basis of the "de-evolution" of the movie.

The second thing that came to mind was the man's reaction when he was arrested. He immediately admitted to not being good with watching children. And then when asked why his wife left him with the kids while she was out of state, he replied with "She thought I could handle it this time." Tihs was one of the last thing's the reporter says in his story, and frankly I think he's burying the lead. If you flip it around, you can come up with a great lead story for The Onion: "Man's Wife Thinks He Can Handle Their Care This Time, Kids End Up in Street".

Seriously, there are so many laughable, cryable things in this story that I think I'll just leave the rest of it up for your interpretation.

I'm Not The Least Bit Sorry For Lindsay--And You Shouldn't Be Either

Seriously, I hope Lindsay Lohan serves every bit of her 90 day jail sentence. Of course, she won't. Most non-violent first time female offenders typically serve only 25 percent of their original sentences. But I'd still like to see her serve it all.

According to MADD, someone dies from drunk driving every 45 minutes. And most of those people who are driving don't have access to personal drivers or an entourage or enough money to buy cab rides from LA to New York for 1 million people.

We've all had moments where we've pushed the limits of driving and drinking. Right or wrong it happens. But what kills me with Lindsay is that she has had multiple DUI arrests over several years. And at least 4 stints in rehab. And a cocaine possession arrest. And the day before she's to go to jail, she checks herself in to a treatment facility---owned by her latest lawyer (Robert Shapiro--also known as OJ's savior and the spokesperson for legalzoom.com). There has to be a point where someone says enough. As a taxpayer, it pisses me off to think of how much time and energy our legal system has wasted in tracking her down, issuing warrants, arraignments, proceedings, and more. I mean, couldn't California just make Lindsay pay a percentage of their budget deficit? Could she subsidize the thousands of state workers taking massive pay cuts or losing their jobs?

To think that you're above the law, is ridiculous. I know it's the status of fame today, but I'm not sure it's just fame. I think it's primarily money. If you've got the money, you can get out of jail even when you deserve it.

Here's what I DON'T want to see. I don't want to see Lindsay doing PSAs for drunk driving or substance abuse. I don't want to see publicity shots of her doing community service at the Special Olympics. I don't want her publicists and lawyers trying to gloss over what she's done and spin it in the public with photo shoots. I want her to spend 90 days in jail. Not 90 minutes.

South Park Was Right Again

A few years ago, South Park did a spoof on Mel Gibson during an episode entitled "The Passion of the Jew." There's a whole story line where Kenny and Stan track down Mel Gibson to get their money back after having to sit through what they called a religious snuff film. Here's the part where South Park is right: They depict Mel Gibson as being bat-shit crazy. This was long before any "sugar tits" comments or any leaked phone conversation.

At the time it did what it was supposed to do: made us laugh. Mel Gibson was depicted in his blue Braveheart face, running around naked and saying crazy stuff. I wondered how mad Mel Gibson would be about it. But looking back it just proved that they were more insightful than I ever gave them credit for.

Seriously. How holier than thou do you have to be to think you can talk about women, races, religions and be so incredibly insulting and not face any public backlash? Everyone has the right to say whatever they want to say. It's a great freedom that we share. But with most freedoms there are unintended consequences. One of which is knowing that you may have the right to say anything you want, but it's not the best idea to always do so.

I'm Strangely Intrigued

First of all, I can only move my arms in small increments right now. Today's boot camp was focused mostly on arms and mine are paying the price for it. I actually benched more today at boot camp than what I maxed out at in high school. It wasn't a lot, but considering I could mostly just comfortably bench the bar, it was a step forward.

But I digress. So, I'm now torn. I thought I always hated Leonardo DiCaprio for being a smug bastard that only dated models and was not at all attractive. Now I'm torn because I love Chris Nolan as a director (Hello, I've professed my love of Dark Knight already), and I want to see his new movie, but it's got Leonardo DiCaprio. Then I realized. I actually like most Leo movies. How can this be? Ugh, I might have to reconsider my anti-Leo stance.

Two Things that Made Today Weird

1) For some reason the eyeliner I used decided today would be the day that it would smudge under my eye. This not only made me look creepy but also gave me the appearance of a fighter with a black eye for a good part of the morning until I went to the bathroom. All in all. Not a good look for me.

2) I was on my way to Lowe's to buy some rope (different story, different day) when I was behind a bright yellow Toyota FJ Cruiser that bore a Twilight sticker and a personalized Tennessee license plate with the word "Cullen." For those of you not in the know, or not caring, that is the name of the main vampier character family in the Twilight books.

I have been known to be a super fan of things (Anne, you don't need to mention Matt Damon, as I can "out" myself of being completely obsessed with him during my college years. And yes, I did go to two Backstreet Boys concerts --in my defense on that one, the beer lines were WAY short at those concerts.) That being said, I draw the line at having a personalized license plate or, as a separate matter, airburshing of any type. I also will not give naming rights to my children to a fictual character unless it's something cool and enduring like Scout.

Am I wrong?

Four Hours of Interrupted Sleep

I went to bed at the normal time of night last night. Laid there watching TV ("Million Dollar Baby" one of the best and most depressing movies around), and then made a deep concerted effort to roll over and go to sleep after two hours of watching TV. I went to sleep for 20 minutes, woke up and tried to go back to sleep. Did all the tricks. Relaxation. Meditation, clearing of the mind. All of it. None of it worked.

So I crawled out of bed and watched two more movies on the couch before Chef got up at 4 a.m. for work. I got back into bed (had the bed to myself--well, mostly. Some of the cats snuggled up with me.) I was up and down for about 4 hours. So all in all, I ended up getting about 4 hours of crappy sleep. And it took three frosty caffeinated beverages before I could start on the work that I needed to do. Nothing says professionalism like an error-filled presentation fueled from sleep-deprivation.

Oddly enough running on empty is a lot like being a little tipsy. I'm not nearly as sharp and it takes twice as long to do things. Fun! I'd try and take a nap, but I know that'd just screw me up for tonight. I hate having sleep problems, but especially when I'm not stressing out about anything in particular. I expeted it when I've got troubles, but it sneaks up on me when I'm okay.

And I'm not even in a frame of mind to go back

My work, the American Heart Association, had a huge push to our year end last week. It was a six state concerted effort to get the last bits of donations scraped from the sides of bowls and added to the cake of year-long progress. Baking started again the next day for this analogy. It's a bad analogy, but it works because this year we will spend the whole year preparing for next year. Meaning the money raised this year will be put into the oven and out comes something substantial. Sometimes its research, sometimes its community programs, sometimes its cool stuff we haven't even seen before.

All that is a long way to say that we're in a perpetual cycle that is beginning again. And I'm already behind. How can that be? I still have an open position so while I shift focus from my duties to cover the position, I lose ground on my job and while I'm focusing on the duties of my job, I'm losing ground for the open position. It's a battle that will only be won when the right candidate is found. Actually, it's a battle that will only be won about three months or so after the right candidate is found.

But I digress. That is all a long set up for me to say that I'm not quite ready to go into work today. It's Tuesday, but feels like Monday. If I had meetings scheduled back to back to back today, I might've called in sick and curled up on the couch to watch New Moon again to get into the mood to watch Eclipse. But it's a planning day. We have them monthly and its our time to graciously plan out what needs to be done and how we're going to do it. I must say that if there ever were a planning day that I needed to have, it's today's. And I'm now slightly more ready to go back.

Slightly.

Guess Who's Going on a Diet?

Nope, not me. Well, of course I'm trying to watch what I eat, but the real one going on a diet is Genghis. We took our little buddy to the vet yesterday because he had been scratching excessively at one of his ears. And as the vet tech tried to pull Genghis out of the carrier and struggled mightily, it was time to realize that Genghis is overweight. Don't get me wrong. He's a very muscular cat, but he's still a cat. And at nearly 20 lbs, he's put on a little too much weight.

During the exam we found out that his ear scratching was a bacterial infection. It was a little gross and a little reminiscent of my childhood when the vet pulled out the ear scope and it was covered in waxy build-up. I had an ailment as a kid that made my ears produce more wax than an average person. So I had to have my ears cleaned a LOT when I was younger. It sucked and I could relate to Genghis. Luckily, he just have to undergo some daily ear washings and drops for the next couple of weeks.

Of course, that will seem like nothing compared to his diet. Since we can't really just change Genghis's eating habits without affecting the other cats, things are a little hairy. Instead of the normal free feeding (leaving the food out all day), we are leaving the food out for an hour two times a day. When we picked up the bowls last night, there were quite a few meows of protest. In fact, the cats were more rambunctious and louder than normal last night.

I'm hoping that a week or so of the new routine will have Genghis looking a little more fit and the other cats not so whiny. Every single one of them has followed me around the apartment at one point today and looked up at me and Meowed as loud as possible. I'm not one who can talk with animals, but I'm fairly certain each one was saying "where the f*&k is our food?".

Last Night I Slept without an Aid--It was Kind of a Big Deal

Last night I went to sleep all by myself. Not like I slept alone, but that I went to sleep without the help of my generic Ambien. It wasn't some big test, but more like a necessity because I forgot to pick up the prescription from Walgreen's before the pharmacy closed. I'm not a hero and I never pretend to be one.

So I had to draw upon the bag of tricks that I used to fall asleep pre-prescription days. I waited until I was tired before I headed to bed. I fell asleep to the lulling sounds of Chef's snores and the Style Network's Clean House. And I actually stayed asleep for the majority of the night. I only woke up three times in the night. And was able to go back to sleep each time.

However, one night does not a lifetime make. I got my prescription filled and picked it up today. So I'm again not playing the hero and will be induced into a log-sawing slumber in just a few hours. And I'm so excited for it.

Bacon tastes good. Pork chops taste good.

Tonight was penne with a tomato, bacon, cheese sauce. Sounds grossly unhealthy and sure there was some fat from the bacon, but what doesn't right? With the exception of the Olsen twins. All good things have some fat.

So, bacon, wine, pasta, tomatoes, garlic, and basil. Stir stir stir. Toss toss toss. Yumminess in my mouth. And not altogether that bad for me in small portions.

Good times. I wish that Chef had some of it. However, he headed to bed a little early tonight. Must have been the loads of laundry and cleaning he did while I was at work today. God bless it. The only problem is that I am now relegated to working on work things because I have the time, nothing on TV and the work. Or I could close up shop and relax. Or write a blog entry. Decisions, decisions.

Meal Plan Week Two

Okay, so week one was fairly successful. Aside from the great chicken debacle, we ate pretty well and I didn't have to answer a lot of food-related questions. This week has started out along a similiar vein. One thing I will say is that I'm a little over ambitious in the amount of meals I should be cooking each week. Mostly because we have a full fridge and need to add at least one leftover night.

We had cheesy grits with shrimp and bacon on Saturday night. Delish. Truly good. Tonight I think it's garlicky penne with broccoli. I had something else on the menu, but I'm a few dishes behind. I get overzealous.

Nonetheless, the experiment continues...

Mustard Chicken...Not so good

Tonight's dinner started out with good intentions and ended up with an emergency run for sustenance via a drive-thru. I'm fairly certain that's how most people end up in the their cars lined up for food that's passed through a window. That and good advertising.

But I digress. It was a baked chicken with a mustard herb rub. I made it, baked it and it took it out. The smell was pretty gross. I couldn't even make myself try it. I just asked Chef what he wanted from where and grabbed my purse. He was also in charge of clean-up or as he called it "hazardous waste disposal." Okay, it wasn't THAT bad, but it wasn't good.

Tomorrow is a garlicky penne with broccoli. It's also my normal grocery day, so I've got to come up with some recipes for next week. Again, I'm open to anything you all want to send me!!

Chicken Parm Night Treated Us Alright

I used a Cooking Light recipe tonight for some Chicken Parmesan. It might have been "light" but it was also delicious. I have to admit that I fudged mine up. The pan wasn't hot enough and I was impatient, so the first round of tenders stuck to the pan. Chef intervened for his round. Even thought they weren't perfect looking, my tenders were delicious.

So three nights down and two to go. Tomorrow features one of my new favorite vegetables: brussel sprouts. Damn, those things are delicious. Just roasted with some salt, pepper and olive oil.

Cooking is nice but thankfully doesn't take up all night. What is there to watch on TV this summer? It seems like nothing. Everything on Showtime and HBO is ending, except for TrueBlood and FINALLY Entourage. Nothing good on network TV. No good sports. I guess I'll have to spend more time reading!

Well, I liked it

Tonight we had artichoke chicken pasta, a recipe from an American Heart Association cookbook, by the way. I love artichokes. I love olives, feta, olive oil, Mediterranean spices, all that stuff. And I love them all together.

Apparently my love to artichokes blocked out the fact that Chef isn't a fan. I swear that I asked him, but clearly I didn't listen too closely to the answer because I had two dishes this week featuring artichokes. One was put on hold and was a pizza, so luckily, I can adjust that accordingly.

Nevertheless, tonight's dish featured artichokes heavily (as evident by the title) as well as lemon, garlic, red pepper flakes, salt and a bit of olive oil. It seemed to be a good, lighter flavored summer kind of recipe. And I loved it. It was flavorful, delicious and filled me up. Three things I look for in any meal. Add some salad on the side and BAM, I'm good to go. Needless to say, Chef wasn't the biggest fan as it tasted strongly of artichokes.

It was an easy recipe that only took about 30 minutes start to finish (Chef awesomely cut and cooked the chicken for me) and came in at 298 calories per serving. I probably could've used whole wheat pasta to lower some of the sugars, but I didn't.

So night two of cooking is under the belt. Tomorrow is a baked chicken parm (non-breaded). I'm kind of excited that we're eating some different stuff. I'm a little nervous because we've had leftovers both nights and I'm thinking that we might have to have a "clean out the fridge" dinner. Although I can't really complain about having too much food that's ready to eat after having no prepared food options, can I? Of course I can. The grass is always greener. . .

Just a food question that's a little off topic, but when did IHOP start thinking that diabetic-coma inducing carnival food was a good marketing strategy? Funnel cakes are not main dishes. Putting syrupy fruit and whipped cream on everything does not translate into a fruit serving and a dairy serving. Stuffing pancakes or French toast or crepes with cream cheese is not the best start to the day. Am I the only one whose noticed this?

What's for Dinner? Stuffed Shells

Tonight was the first real night in the meal plan. We ended up going out on Saturday night to Sportsman's Grill (and the newly opened Sweet Cece's--which was delicious--I had Cake Batter FroYo with fruity pebbles on top--heaven! But I digress...). So instead of taquitos on Saturday, we had them on Sunday. And they were delicious, as usual.

Instead of having the artichoke white pizza from Sunday, I went ahead with the regularly scheduled program: Stuffed Shells. Even though it was not all that different than spaghetti, the fact that the noodles were differently shaped and the proportions of herbs were different made it a good change. Plus the recipe came from a Trim and Terrific book my stepmom Robin gave me and so the calorie count per serving was about 400 calories. And it was mighty hearty.

Chef suggested measuring out some low fat ricotta cheese to add a bit to each shell. That would've been nice. I think the only fault was that the recipe made so much and called for a 2-quart dish when it should've been larger. So some of the shells didn't receive as much sauce and dried out a little.

All in all, the main point that made me excited was that I was excited again about cooking. I forgot how fun it can be when you're doing it for fun and not out of chore or obligation. I hope this enthusiasm lasts for a while.

Strategic Grocery Shopping

So one of the banes of my existence is the question "What's for dinner tonight?". Seems like a simple question and it's not that difficult really. But the question seems loaded. By the end of the day the last thing I want to do is make another decision. I'm typically drained as soon as I walk in the door and pillaging through the cabinets to find something.

So after being inspired by my friend who plan the week's meals and derive their lists off of it, I decided to put the effort back in. I used to sit with Chef and plan for the week. It made life easier. But much like you forget how good it feels to work out after you've neglected yourself for a while, I forgot how nice it is to have the "What's for dinner?" question answered before I walk through the door.

Tonight was grocery night and my cart runneth over. The recipes were less a contributing factor to that than the fact that I was hungry when shopping and it had been about two weeks since I'd done a thorough shopping trip. Tomorrow is the first day and not that outside of the box. It's taquito night. The timing is judged by the ripeness of the avocados--the right avocados are key to the guacamole. Other dishes I'm making this week (for the first time):

• artichoke white pizza
• crab spring rolls
• jumbo stuffed shells
• artichoke rotini with chicken
• Herbed Chicken Parmesan
• chicken with mustard and herbs
• Penne with garlicky broccoli

Wish me luck!

Shudder Island

It was my fault. I was the one who bought into the hype. Or at least the "it's got an ending you won't believe!" promotion. I made Chef watch "Shutter Island" with me last night. I'm not someone who hates Leonardo Dicaprio. I'm not a huge fan either, but I respect his abilities. I loved "Gone Baby Gone" and "Mystic River" (both Dennis Lehane adaptions), so I had high hopes for this one.

It was a let down to say the least. About 45 minutes too long. About one twist too short. Visually beautiful, I will give it that. I should've known better after trying to give M. Night Shyamalan more than just "The Sixth Sense." (Who else has suffered through "The Village"?). The last movie I was truly surprised in was "The Hangover" and that's just because we saw it fairly early and with no added hype or indication of what the plot would be. But I should know that if something is advertising a twist ending, it's probably not a good sign.

However, if you want to save the two and a half hours and be more fulfilled, just check out this video that truly did surprise me: http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=264883&title=m.-night-shyamalan-twist-ending

Putting the "Um" in Hump Day

As in "um, why did I wait so long to send out that email?" Or "um, why is my list of things to do suddenly twice as long as it was yesterday?". I know the reason. One part procrastination, two parts internal meetings to get things rolling and a healthy pinch of summer. Is it just me or does it seem like it takes longer for things to happen on a business front in the summer? People are randomly on vacation, out for Fridays, taking an afternoon off to go watch their children's baseball/softball/soccer games. Except for the last one, that would describe me, as well.

But today is Wednesday which means that tomorrow is Thursday and then we're in the home stretch for two days of player's choice. I'm choosing sometime soon to get a mani/pedi and do some organizing. Plus my friends up north were all excited about going organic, shopping at the farmer's market and eating in season. It inspired me to do a few things--or rather resume some things I'd been doing: 1) making a log of the next week's meals and deriving the list from that and 2) eating more vegetables. I forget how much I love things until I start talking about them to others. The passion with which I described roasted brussel sprouts made me realize that they aren't in my life enough.

So here's where I need your help. I'm stuck in a cooking rut. Send me your best recipes or favorite web sites for recipes, please!!

Back to Reality

Last week was somewhat less of a reality check as it was the third week in a row that I worked less than 5 days. This week. Not so much. Back to a full work week and all that that entails. I'm also back to missing my girls instead of being with them, but that is a constant for about 360 days a year.

Being up north did inspire me to start cooking more. I've let that slide and know that when I actually cook, I actually care what ends up in my body. Being busy was never an excuse when I was losing weight the first time and shouldn't be an excuse now. So I'm not gonna let it.

Wish me luck. . .

One Day To Indy

I'm having a really rough time writing anything that makes sense for the novel this morning so I'm writing for the blog. Because I rarely make sense here.

Tomorrow I leave for Indianapolis. Well, actually I leave for Bloomington first and then on to Indy the next day. Every year I like to travel up there to leave the oppression of Southern heat and humidity for the only slightly less oppressive Midwestern heat and humidity. However, after getting trapped on the Interstate during a torrential downpour that had everyone driving 4 miles an hour and standing water on the road, I'm ready to get the heck out of dodge before the next round of rain hits.

Aside from the metereological aspects of travel, I'm really looking forward to seeing my girls. There comes a time in your life when you can only have so many people who are lifelong friends. Any friends I make now, although perfectly lovely and a wonderful addition to my life, are not by definition lifelong as they missed some formative years. By formative years, I mean years in which I was prone to drinking excessively, vomiting afterwards, doing stupid stuff while driving, repeatedly making poor decisions, being overdramatic about EVERYTHING, and being a geek.

But these friends are special too because two of them I lived with. I mean, other than living with your husband/boyfriend/lover when do you get the opportunity to live with your best friends? Not too often. And I got to and it was awesome. And now when I see them, we easilly fall back into the rhythm of conversation and poking fun that made us friends in the first place.

So, working today, driving tomorrow and then I'm coming up north!!

Diet is Back and Harder than Ever

Ugh. I've been lax on myself and eating for like 9 months which translates into 15 lbs of weight that I shouldn't be carrying. The good thing is knowing that I know how to lose weight. That sounds simple, but when you've never lost weight in your life it's hard to imagine. When I was at my heaviest, I had never really tried to lose weight. I might have given it a half-hearted week or two fad diet try. But it wasn't until I did the simple things that everyone told me worked was I succesful. The little things like watching my calories, portion sizes and getting active.

So today is day two back on the regime. Counting calories. Ordering smarter. Caring what I'm doing to my body. Wish me luck!

Fine. I'm Hooked. Dammit.

I tried to avoid it, as I do most popular literature. Not because I'm a snob or because I think I know better. Because I don't know better. Anyone who knows my crappy taste in music knows that I don't think myself above craptasticness. However, I tend to avoid things everyone loves because I get disappointed if I don't love it too.

Case in point: A Prayer for Owen Meany. It was suggested to me by at least 6 people so I caved and read it. I hated it. I mean, I absolutely found little redeeming value in the novel. People LOVE this book and I couldn't see the appeal. It took great convincing to read another John Irving novel, but someone swore to me that The World According to Garp was more up my alley. And I'm glad they did, because I really enjoyed that one.

So it was with some trepidation that I started Girl With a Dragon Tattoo. The first 20 percent (I can't say "pages" because I downloaded to the Kindle and therefore there are screens, but not pages) was long and little tedious. And it took more than halfway through before the two main characters met. It's set up to happen the entire book and you're waiting, but it seems to take forever to get there.

But I digress and to avoid spoiling this book that's been out for 5 years, I'll just say. It's getting good.

Vacation Day Ten: Last Vestiges of Relaxation

It's the last official day of my staycation. While a tiny part of me is ready to go back to work, another part of me is ready for a life of being independently wealthy. Who isn't though, right? The good thing about tomorrow is that I wasn't overly ambitious and have no external meetings. One full day of getting caught up and back in the swing of things.

For the last two days, I've been working diligently to get as much relaxing in as possible. It's a tough job, let me tell you. I've slept. I've eaten. I've baked. It's been glorious.

The other thing I'm thanking God for is that for the third week in a row, I'm not working a full work week. I'm off on Friday because I'm heading up to Indianapolis to see my girls. I'm so excited to see them that I wish today was Friday. Plus it will be Liam's first long trip. I've got to get the ipod loaded up and ready to go. Ladies, I'm going to request that we have at least one cocktail of everyone's choosing while we're together.

But until then, I will enjoy the remaining hours of relaxation. Maybe I'll dig back into the Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. I've gotten 56% through it (or at least that's what the Kindle says). Now I'm watching a special on the Wizarding World of Harry Potter section of the Orlando Universal Studios theme park. Is it bad that I really want to go and visit Hogwarts in person? They keep saying "kids" will love it, but that means kids at heart, too, right?

Tomorrow it's back to work. Back to writing every morning. Back to running every morning. Back to eating better. Back to being healthy. Wish me luck.

Vacation Day Eight: Rest and Recovery

Some of you out there might've noticed that vacation day seven did not get chronicled. Frankly, that was poor planning on my part. Yesterday was Chef's birthday and we while we had done the eating celebration at Ruth's Chris, we did the drinking celebration at The Patterson House last night. We left earlier than I anticipated and therefore didn't get a blog entry off before the celebrating began.

And the celebrating was nice. We got to taste the spring menu of cocktails (the favorite of the ones I sampled was the Hush and Wonder--fruity but delicious) before they change it up for the summer. Chef had a drink that was also delicious and the best way to describe it was like drinking liquid cinnamon teddy grahams. I only got a taste, but it was one of the best drinks I've ever had.

We had taken a cab there, but decided to walk home--I had missed boot camp for his birthday so it was probably a good idea to get some exercise. However, about halfway home (it's only a little over a mile), we were regretting the decision. I need another pedicure because my feet are now once again crusty. It was hot last night.

It was a great celebration and a great way to cap off a week of being off. The dread for Monday's barrage of things to do is slowly creeping in. But for today, I am being productive in a domestic sense. I did the grocery shopping and have four loads of laundry in various stages.

I also am soaking up the last moments of cat snuggling. Particularly with Attila. He's my snuggle buddy normally, but we've had more time this week. I think he's going to take it hard when I go back to work. Or maybe I'm just pretending he'd take it hard to feel better about the fact that Genghis adores Chef so much.

So back to laundry. . .

Vacation Day Six: A Little Stir Crazy

The furthest I went outside my apartment today was three feet out the door to admire the rain. And now that it's 8 p.m. and there's nothing on TV until Tosh.0 returns at 9:30 tonight (yay!!), I'm a little stir crazy.

Today in the house Chef and I bathed all the cats. We do that about once every six months just to keep them from smelling too much like cat. Or in Genghis's case, like trail mix for some reason. They all took it better than normal except for Khubla who went nuts. That was dangerous because he still has all his claws plus some extras. Once he got burritoed in a towel, he was fine.

After cat bathing time, I made black bean burgers. It was my first attempt and not too bad. I tried to model them off of the black bean veggie sliders at Ruby Tuesday, except normal sized and without barbecue sauce. I used black beans, brown rice, egg beater, salsa, cumin, garlic, onion powder and bread crumbs (when the rice was not dry enough to make the mixture stick). Pattied those bad boys out and then after cooking in the Foreman grill for 5 minutes, melted a piece of provolone on it, added the Healthy Life low cal white bread bun and some ketchup and was good to go. The nice thing about black bean burgers is that the main ingredients cost about $2 for 4 patties. Not too shabby. Although next time I will probably add more spices and maybe try the barbecue sauce.

The rest of the day was spent in leisure with some occasional email checking when I got bored or felt the compulsion (which truly is a sickness that I need to work on). Chef made pot roast and chipolte mashed sweet potatoes with broccoli for dinner. As usual, it was delicious.

Tomorrow is Chef's actual birthday. I'm planning on going to boot camp, and then coming home to get dolled up and head to the Patterson House for some drinks with my newly 29 year old (as of tomorrow) honey. While it's not another delicious filet, it is some delicious handmade cocktails. I haven't been to the Patterson House since the winter and am hoping the new spring/summer menu is out. Mmmmm.

Until tomorrow. . .

Vacation Day Five: Working Out, Hanging Out

Ah, I'm finding my vacation stride. I had trouble sleeping through the night, but the joy of vacation is that I could get up at 5 a.m. and go back to sleep at 7 a.m. for several more hours. Love it.

Then I got up and had a leisurely morning hanging out with Chef before gathering up my shirt to be returned and heading to Old Navy. I ran a few errands and then went to boot camp. It was a greatly low key day.

The only thing that I'm worried about is my face. There's a huge zit sprouting up on my cheek and it's not looking pretty. Between the giant red blotch and the few episodes of "True Life" I've watched on MTV, I'm getting curious about the Zeno Hot Spot. It kind of freaks me out the Whitney from The City is hawking it. While she has good skin, she's not the most skilled pitchman. Or really speaker. She might be pretty smart, but she sounds like an idiot no matter what comes out of her mouth.

Which brings me back to the Zeno Hot Spot. I totally want to try it and see if I can get rid of this bulbous red raised pimple. But I can't seem to pull the trigger. Has anyone else wanted to check this out?

Vacation Day Four: Sated and Happily Full

Chef's birthday dinner was tonight. We hadn't originally planned for it to be tonight, but we just couldn't hold out on Ruth's Chris any more. It was beckoning like an underage school girl outside the Hot Topic.

We loaded up a little before 5 p.m. and oddly enough weren't the first table in the place. It seems like others couldn't help but indulge as we did on Memorial Day. We started out with seared tuna with a mustard beer sauce (as well as a scotch for Chef and Mendocino Fog Cabernet Sauvignon for me). It was delicious. And only 190 calories. That's one thing we noticed this time that we didn't notice when we went to The Chris in February---calorie counts on the menu. I tried not to let it deter me.

The next course was the filet. Damn delicious. I had one medium. So did Chef. Then he had one that was medium rare. That's right. Chef had two steaks for dinner. When he ordered the second one, the waiter said "You want another steak? The same size?". He sure did. I was so proud. We don't splurge on dining very often so it's great to see him truly enjoy. The picture above was from his second steak. We also had the shoe string potatoes and broccoli au gratin. The broccoli was delicious. The shoestring potatoes left a little to be desired.

After finishing my steak (and his steaks), I had another glass of wine and prepared for the banana tart. It's like banana cream pie with a creme brulee topping. Also decadant and delicious. Not too sweet to overpower, but sweet enough to be a satisfying end to a great, memorable meal. It lasted more than 2 hours and I'm glad. If we had rushed through that meal, I would've been disappointed.

All in all, it was just as good as we had hoped it would be. And in this day and age of being perpetually underwhelmed, it was awesome to have something be just as good or better than you hoped or remembered it to be.

Vacation Day Three: Dreading a Week from Today

Is it sad that I'm already dreading NEXT Sunday when I have to go back to work? Yeah, it is. Today I came to the conclusion that 8 seconds is not only the length that bull riders aim to stay on the bull, but also length of time Krispy Kreme recommends to reheat their original glazed in the microwave.

Chef also introduced me to the exciting taste of Chorizo Chipotle Corn Nuts. These spicy nuggets of crunchy deliciousness are awesome. The only problem is that I can't find them anywhere. They're not even listed on the official corn nuts web site. If you know where I can get my hands on some, let me know! Here's what the package looks like:

Aside from eating, watching the UFC fight and a Tosh.0 marathon, my day has been pretty tame. And I love it!

Vacation Day Two

It's Saturday. That means it doesn't really feel like vacation, because I'm normally off on Saturdays anyway (last Saturday notwithstanding). Slept in. Watched Alice in Wonderland. Wondered what it is about Tim Burton, Helena Bonham Carter and Johnny Depp that makes them want to scare the crap out of small children. Which lead me to think about Daniel Tosh's stand up where he points out that Johnny Depp is 47. Hard to believe he's 47.

Caught up on Glee. Why can't the show go back to actually moving forward and not just be a weekly lesson of a song that probably won't be used in their regional competition? Every week they practice for regionals but don't really make any progress. If I were Will Shuester, I'd be disappointed. Also, what happened to the Jesse kid? He just shows up whenever he wants to? Why isn't Quinn getting more pregnant each week? What happened to the magic that was?

Ate leftovers for lunch and am plotting taquitos for dinner. Maybe I'll go to bed at 8 p.m. or maybe I'll stay up until 4 a.m. There's something liberating about that.

Vacation Day One: I'm staycating

It is officially here. The Ball is over. The majority of contracts have been signed (just a few more to go when I get back). My brain can take a break now. At least from work. I am officially on vacation until June 7th. No, I'm not going anywhere. And I'm so excited about it.

I'm taking the staycation, but I'm also vacating some responsibility for the week, so I'm staycating. My big plans include working out, writing, hanging out with Chef and playing with the kitties. It also doesn't hurt that Chef's birthday is in the middle of this time off. The big celebration? How about a metal plate heated to 425 degrees with a medium rare filet mignon that has a scoop of butter, salt, pepper and parsley on it? Sound good? Yeah, it's flippin' delicious. I was lucky enough to get a trip to Ruth's Chris for my birthday and we've been plotting our return visit ever since.

We also have a return trip to the Patterson House plotted out for another night of celebration and libations. Could this be any better? I get to spend time with the one I love and the kitties too.

The other good news is that after I get back, I spend 4 days in the office before I leave for a trip to see my girls in Indy. I am so ecstatic.

All this time off and I still have more plans. I'm going to finish reading my book and pick up Girl With a Dragon Tattoo after several people have recommended it. I am also going to try and knock some more out on my novel. Yes, that lingering novel. In fact, I've been working on it diligently for the last several weeks. More than 30 days to be precise. I actually made it through my entire pledge--getting up 30 minutes earlier and knocking out a little each day. It's a habit that I'm going to keep for a while. Let's see how much more I can knock out.

Okay, I'm off to clean and devein some shrimp for scampi dinner tonight. Mmmm. Delicious start to the staycation already!

To Know Me is to Know I Love Shoes

You know I have a shoe problem when I spend 10 minutes regaling Chef with my latest shoe finds and then trot them out on numerous occasions just to wear them around the house for a few moments. He's pretty good natured about it, but in the end, I can't really expect other people to get as excited about my shoes as I do.

It's hard to believe that just a few years ago, I wore brown and black shoes (primarily stacked heel loafers) almost exclusively. I would never have dreamed of owning a pair of red shoes, let alone blue floral patterned ones. It wasn't practical and I was too concerned with matching precisely. However, I'm now very discerning about my shoe choices. If I bust out a new pair and don't get a "Where'd you get those?" or "Nice shoes" when I wear them, I know they weren't the best investment. And it's also a reason that I've limited my shoe purchases dramatically in the last few months.

However, I did make a purchase for the Ball and I am now counting the days until I get to wear them again. They're definitely more formal, but I bet I can get away with them with some jeans and some "going out" clothes. Check them out. They're like the photo above, but they have silver sparkles (not multi-colored).

The next question is. . .what will the next shoes look like?

So Much To Do, So Little Energy

I have so much to finish out on for the Ball, and I'm chipping away, but it seems like my attention span is about 15 minutes at a time. That's all people are getting out of me. 15 minutes of solid thinking and then I need a break.

Thankfully, only two more work days and I get that break. Our office, and whole region for that matter, is off this Friday and Monday for Memorial Day. And then I took off the rest of next week to recoup from a long year. I will be writing, reading, and celebrating Chef's birthday (it's on the 3rd. Mark your calendars.) To celebrate, we're going to Ruth's Chris to get a filet cooked on a 425 degree metal plate topped with melted butter, salt, pepper and parsley. Then to the Patterson House for some after dinner drinks. Can someone say taxi cab all night?

Next week, butter and sizzling meat aside, I also need to get back on the eating well wagon. I'm still running every morning, but my apathetic approach to eating is not working well for my waistline. Wish me luck!

Now to just get through the next two days of work. . .

Phew!

Last night was the Rutherford Heart Ball. I am relieved and excited it's over. Chef probably is too. Also my friends and family are ready for me to return to the land of the living, so to speak. It was a beautiful event that made our volunteers feel great. Things went smoothly (there's always room for improvement, clearly) and our guests had a good time. I don't think there's a whole lot more I can ask for.

I'm also grateful. I give Erin, our social events director, credit for pulling it off as she did so much, including keeping me from losing my sanity over the last four months. Plus tons of AHA staff and come of our awesome volunteers came out in full force last night to help make the night beautiful.

My favorite part of post-even clean up was that one of my co-workers (Alyssa, I'm talking about you) put a mannequin torso in my front passenger seat and buckled her in. She told me she had done it, but that did not stop me from scaring myself silly as I went to my car at 1 a.m. and thought someone had broken. It also did not stop me from scaring myself a few more times as I would catch the mannequin in my peripheral vision and jump a little. In my defense, it was late and I had been working for 16 hours yesterday with about 3 hours of nervous sleep the night before.

And if being scared also entirely by my own shadow (or that of a plastic armless torso) was not enough of a challenge on the ride home, I almost hit a deer carcass about 3 blocks from the event site. Two cars were stopped in the left hand lane with their emergency flashers on and I slowed down, which ended up saving Liam Nissan his front bumper. I was able to see the dead deer laying in the right lane that I was in and manuveur around it.

So what next? Well, today is a taking it easy kind of day. Friday is all about the mani/pedi that my hands and feet are screaming for. And next week is already scheduled for a vacation. I literally cannot wait. Focusing on work this week is going to be a challenge.

Best. Boyfriend. Ever.

Today was a great day. Probably one of the best days of my professional life in terms of accomplishment, but then I get home and Chef makes it better.

After a day of jubilation, I walk through the door and am greeted by the smells of pot roast, mashed chipotle sweet potatoes and broccoli. He's cooked dinner and is putting on the finishing touches. I no sooner get the "thank you!" out (as it's 7:30 and I've been working late), then I go into the bedroom. On the bed are a pile of my clothes that he washed and folded. I change out of my work clothes and into my comfy clothes, make my way back to the kitchen and Chef has a glass of wine waiting on me. How did I get so lucky?

While I always appreciate this kind of help and treatment, the fact that he knew that I was having a high stress week was extra special. What it comes down to is this: Nanna nanna boo boo. He's mine. Not yours. I'm so lucky!!

New Dress, Same Me

Yesterday I went off in search of a new dress. Not like a "Mother's Day Brunch" kind of dress. More like a formal dinner dress. Except this one was tricky. Because it couldn't look like a mother of the bride kind of thing, but I couldn't show more cleavage than appropriate for a business meeting.

That's because the dress is for the Rutherford Heart Ball, an event that I'm working at, but still have to look good for. It's a fine line. I knew starting the day that it was going to be a long haul. I also knew that I would not be able to find the right dress without trying on a lot of wrong ones. It's the law of numbers. In the end, I went to 11 stores. Tried on 38 dresses. Found one that I didn't have to take out a loan to buy.

I had a beautiful dress picked out pretty early on, but realized that it had two major flaws: 1) it was intended to be worn without a bra and 2) it was a long gown meant for someone taller than 5'2". It went back on the rack as a dire "in case of emergency and nothing else" back of the mind

The one thing that I noticed about every store was the abundance of fish scale dresses. Those dresses that at the bottom have fish scale looking overlapped fabric for the bottom half. I'm not a big fan. I could see how they could provide a forgiving lay in a tight dress for a less than perfect body, but you also have to look like you're wearing a fish scale dress.

The other thing I noticed was that there wasn't a whole lot of selection. I could find about 100+ different styles of jeans, but there weren't a whole lot of non-slutty looking dresses. I think part of the problem was that the dresses I saw were leftover prom or wedding season mother of the bride. Since my age range is between those two, there left a lot to be desired.

Finally, I found one that was black, short but not too short, pretty but not outrageous. I then realized that I would have to find a strapless bra to wear it. That caused a whole different kind of panic. So I let it go, and moved on. In a miraculous twist of fate, I ended up finding a strapless bra before I found another dress. Above is what I'll be sporting for the event.

So, if anyone out there has a very bling-worthy diamond/diamonique/rhinestone/crystal necklace or size 7 1/2 or 8 strappy sandals in silver that they'd let me borrow, let me know. The Ball is Saturday.

Why Can't I Do Everything At Once

On my run this morning, I was pondering the big spheres in my life and started wondering why I can't get my shit together to do everything at once. I can write daily and work out. I can eat right and work out. I can work like hell, but not spend enough time with friends. I can spend time with friends but not accomplish everything that needs to be done. I can have a clean house or cook, but not both. I can catch up on TV or read.

I don't like that I can't do everything. Damn you, eternal limitations.

And I'm Not Sure Wedding Planning Is Up My Alley Either

Next weekend is the Rutherford Heart Ball. Since the position that I manage is open, I've been in charge of the event. One thing I know for sure is that I do not have the care for detail that it takes to make these things pretty. Organized I can do. I can make sure logistically stuff runs like there is no tomorrow. But when it comes to picking centerpieces or creating an ambiance, I'm no good.

Thankfully, I have someone wonderful who is handling that for me. She makes the experience one that's super for the guests while coming in on budget. I wonder if she would do weddings. Not that my wonderful stepmother hasn't offered her skills, as she is also got that special gift.

But now that we're this close, I am ready for it to be the day after the event and bask in the glow of a job well done. And cross my fingers that the money comes in. I'm trying to let go of anything I can't control and there's not a lot that I can control right now. Just crossing my fingers and hoping the room is giving.

Speaking of giving, if anyone out there wants to give me some time next Saturday the 22nd and help out at the event, I would be GREATLY appreciative. We could still use some people to help us execute the plan for the night of the event. You get to dress up and have me owe you one!

Women make 80 cents to the dollar, what's up with that?

I realize that women's rights and the underrepresentation of women in high levels corporate America is not a new obstacle, but I was reading a new article on it, so it came to mind. Apparently women are up to 80 cents on the dollar for the same work. What's scary is that while women are about half the work force, they make up only 3 percent of the CEOs at the top 500 companies.

Even looking at where I work which is about 90 percent (or more) female, the majority of men who work here hold management positions. It makes me wonder what it will take --or rather how long--before leadership at all organizations are more reflective of society. It's also weird that one of the areas that I am in is one that has basically equal representation and earning potential (Advertising and Promotional Managers). I always wonder what industries or areas are dominated by females and why. Non-profit tends to be predominantly female and I think it's our incessant need to feel like what we're doing has meaning to it.

Either way, it's a continuous struggle and not one that's likely to be solved during my career--although I'll keep wishing it would.

It was More than a Hotel and some Guitars

It was a little bizarre and only slightly baffling that Nashville's flooding hasn't gotten a lot of media attention from the national media. The Opryland Hotel has gotten some good coverage, as well as it should because it's a huge hub for tourism. The other thing I've seen in numerous places, including abc.com, is the loss of Keith Urban's guitars. I realize he's a lyrical poet and musical genius and married to Nicole Kidman, but I think the loss of human and animal lives, as well as one of the costliest natural disasters in US history might trump the loss of a few Gibsons.

It's being dubbed as a "1000 year flood" some places and "500 year flood" in others and both would probably be an accurate description. There are some places of massive destruction--including the area of my first apartment complex in town--but there's also a lot of goodwill, as well. Without the nation watching our every move or a lot of support, the governor and mayor and countless other government and emergency workers have worked countless hours to keep things in order. Our infrastructure mostly kicked in to place and is getting help to the areas that need it.

Aside from that, it's heartwarming to watch the community band together to help out. About three days after the images from the disaster were getting out, people already got together to have a radiothon and telethon. More than $2 million raised in about 24 hours from the citizens of the area. Helping hands going to neighborhoods and helping clean out ravaged homes.

Everywhere I go people know how lucky they got. Chef and I were no exception. We found out today that we were one of two apartments in our building with no real damage. Two of 16. People are moving from one apartment with a collapsed roof to another in the complex.

Feelings of goodwill and immediate rebuilding abound. It's nice to see but we also know that it's a long road ahead and we'll keep going. Even if no one outside the area is watching. . .

Downtown Nashville underwater

LP Field--The Cheap Seats are Still Dry

Inside the Opryland Hotel

Two Blocks From Our Apartment--I learned that it only takes a foot of water to float a car.

Quick Trip to Kentucky

One of the great things about living less than 3 hours away from my hometown is that people have to call before dropping by. One of the great things about living less than 3 hours away from my hometown is that when there's an emergency I can shoot back up there. Yesterday was one of those cases. My dad called on Monday and my grandma was super sick (that's a medical term). After being in the hospital for a few days, she was getting worse and not better.

So a quick trip up and I got to see how she's doing for myself. Luckily, the meds were kicking in and she was on the upswing for the first time since her admission. It makes it so much easier to have the luxury while I can to hop in the car and be with family. I should do it more often. Thanks to my aunts and dad for keeping me in the loop and for dinner!

More thoughts and prayers would be great to continue. If all goes smoothly, tomorrow is pacemaker day for Grandma Auda!

24 Hours of Coverage

I feel a little sorry for some of the news reporters around here. It's been all hands on deck for the flood coverage for the last 24-48 hours. No regular programming. Just floods, shelters, government addresses, rescues and then repeat. It's weird because some of the sports reporters are covering this too. Some are not so experienced with the regular reporting and having a hard time with some of the sadder stories (I'm not talking about you, Joe--I know where you started, buddy! You're rocking those McGavock reports).

It's pretty surreal. Some of the places that were covered in water yesterday are dry today, but all the concrete is smashed up and debris floating everywhere. Other places are dry as they ever were and untouched. While I am still very lucky because we only had a minor leak, I now realize just how lucky because a few of the apartments upstairs from us had the roof cave in from the weight of the water. Some of the residents have already rented U-hauls to get their valuables out while the crews work on it. Others are just pitching their furniture in the dumpster. The Opryland Hotel has its first floor underwater up to about 6 feet and isn't estimated to reopen for MONTHS. It's crazy to think of what mother nature is capable of.

The other thing crazy is just how far people will go to save their belongings. While showing live coverage of an almost entirely submerged house that had caught fire, one of the local stations had a viewer on the phone. Turns out the viewer lived in a house just a block down the street and while his entire basement was under water AND his wife and granddaughter had lost their car while evacuating, he was still not leaving. His biggest concern? Running out of dog food. I love my animals, but I'd evacuate in a heartbeat. They'd just be coming with me!

Tomorrow, I'm heading to Indiana, where I know it's drier. My grandma, affectionally known as Naughty Auda, is in the ICU and it's time I visited her. It's the beauty of living close enough to be able to get there when I need to be. Prayers and good wishes for my grandma!!

I'm On A Boat

If you haven't been in Nashville lately, I'd avoid it unless you're a fan of being stranded or water sports. We knew it was going to rain all weekend, but I for one wasn't expecting the Arc-building floods that we've been hit with. Nearly 12 inches of rain in 48 hours--that's about 25% of our annual rain fall.

Needless to say, our sewers and bridges weren't really prepared for this. There was a mobile home floating down the Interstate yesterday. Luckily, despite living on a first floor apartment, Chef and I have been spared for the majority of the calamity. Our first floor apartment was actually built about 6 feet off the ground--thank you, engineers! We've had a drip from above that's evidence of a leak, but it's small and of all places, dripping into the sink. We're not part of the 21,000 without power in the county or without suitable drinking water. I went to the grocery store Saturday morning before it really hit. The only complaint we really have is the lack of good TV on to pass the time.

Either way there were a dozen or so boats deployed today by the metro emergency management agency to help rescue others who saw the standing or rushing waters and thought "That doesn't look so bad" only to realize that it was that bad. Which made me think that this is the only time that people don't really want to be on a boat. Right, T-Pain?

A Bunch of People Here Who Love You Like Crazy. . .

Sometimes I think Chef and I are the only two people who still watch South Park. Then of course, there was the whole editing of last week's show and threat on the lives of Matt Stone and Trey Parker. So I know at least some Muslim extremists have heard of the show.

I have to say the rest of the world not watching is missing out. This season has been pretty damn hilarious. And this week was one of my favorites because it combined my love of Jeff Van Vonderen and Intervention with the hilarity of South Park and my favorite characters of Butters and Kyle.

And that clip doesn't even take into account some of the funniest parts of the episode. The only part I would critique South Park on is that the "Jeff Van Vonderen" character doesn't specifically say that "there's a bunch of people here who love you like crazy." Every true Intervention fan knows that line is a prompt in the at-home drinking game version.

I'm not buying Jessica Simpson without Make-Up. Do you?

I like the idea behind Marie Claire's magazine focus this month--a celebrity on the cover supposedly without any make-up, retouching or hair styling. However, I'm not buying it completely. I realize that celebrities are mostly better than average looking people. But here's the thing. I've never had a day with skin that even on it's own. And I don't think I'm alone. I realize she's been a spokesperson for Pro-Activ and therefor can moisturize her situation nicely, but her skin's just a little too even.

What do you think? How much work was done on this picture?

Day Three - A Test and Triumph

Is it weird or self-fulfilling prophecy that I'm writing more in my blog about writing more in my life? Either way, I'm doing both. And today was the biggest test of the three days. I had to get up before the sun to get the writing and the running in. But I did it. And I still outlasted Chef, who is asleep on the couch as I type.

Of course, he has to be asleep on the couch to allow me to watch "Glee". He thinks it's funny, but hates the singing, which is kind of the whole thing. I mean it is based on a singing group of teens. But who doesn't love Jane Lynch? I also love the dimwitted blonge cheerleader. She has great one-liners. This week's fave "I think my cat is reading my diary."

My cat doesn't read my diary because it's online and Genghis's lack of opposable thumbs make navigating the web difficult. Turning pages aren't even an option. Oh. And he's a feline.

Day One-6:05 a.m.

I got up 30 minutes earlier today and got some things started. Yesterday I put my novel all into one document. Sounds simple, but it's not so simple. It made me see all the holes I have in it and how much more there is to do. Which is nice because it's only about 160 pages right now and has some serious progress to make before it can be considered a first draft.

I got about a page written and while it was a nice start, it's not nearly the progress that I need to make. However, the one side effect I didn't quite bank on was thinking about the portion I was working on throughout the day and wanting to open it back up tonight to work on. I think it's just the rhythm of routine. Or the promise of it. Once I stop working regularly on writing, it becomes this insurmountable thing that I'm not doing. Not doing it is more guilt-inducing and makes me feel worse than plopping down crap. Because at least crap is something and can be like a mind-enema.

Hopefully I feel as productive at the end of day 30.

Bad TV on a Sunday Night

Seriously. Without football, there's not a lot on Sunday night TV. I'm relegated to old Reese Witherspoon movies and the Style Network. If I could get Chef to sit through Jerseylicious without bitching about it, I'd be watching those tacky ass Jersey girls tonight. Instead, I'll wait until he's asleep like I usually do.

Can anyone tell me what's up with Jersey lately? I mean, when did tanning until you're an oompa loompa and wearing loads of accessories become the new it thing? When will there be some Hoosier love for the moderately dressed, sensible decision-making girls who work hard and try to accomplish things of substance? Oh, right. Never. I guess that doesn't make good TV. One thing I will give the girls of Jersey is that they squeeze their chunky asses into lycra without a second thought. They think they're sexy even if they are squeezing their size 12 ta tas into a size 8 dress. It's actually nice to see some ladies with boobs and curves on TV. If only they would keep their mouths closed.

Things I Decided Today

I'm over being sick! Hopefully I didn't say that prematurely, but today I'm doing well and sounding like a girl again. And the last couple of days of being overwhelmed, overloaded and overexagerated had me thinking. I need to remember why I love life on a daily basis. And not the typical reasons, like that I bought something or that I get to see Chef. While those are both lovely things, they depend on other people to happen. And when it comes down to it, there are only so many things that we can actually control in a day, right?

I mean, I can't control anything other than my own actions and reactions. So I've decided to try a little experiment. I get up early every week day to jog. It's my time. Now I'm going to get up 30 minutes earlier to make sure I do something else I love each day. Whether it's working on the novel that never seems to progress more than a few pages a month or writing a blog that can be ignored for months on end or reading some fiction for fun, I will do something for myself that I enjoy. And it's going to be active--not watching TV, because I do that enough.

And it has to be the morning. Once the day gets geared up and I'm in work mode, it's too easy for me to beg off things I love doing for myself because I'm tired, busy, don't want to be in front of a computer or I need to spend time with Chef.

So here it is: 30 days to start. 30 minutes earlier. I'll let you know how it goes.

I'm Sick. This Sucks.

Yesterday I started feeling like poo. Not horrible, but sore throat, weird stomach, no taste for anything and a low grade fever. I powered through because I'm loaded up at work and had commitments for volunteers to fulfill. If they had been for my own purposes or even for co-workers, I probably would've begged off. But there's a different sense of obligation when you're doing something for someone who's donating their time.

Woke up today feeling worse than yesterday. Still no appetite (which is an instant sign I'm sick because I'm hungry pretty much no matter what), chills, fever, weird stomach and fever. Again, powered through for work because I already had tomorrow scheduled off for a mental health day. However, about halfway through the day I started with an annoying throat tickle that lead to coughing. And there's the mental fatigue that has me crying at every little thing that seems to go wrong.

So I'm bowing out of boot camp, staying parallel to the floor at home instead of at writers group and planning on spending all of tomorrow sleeping or doing some lounging variation. I am probably the worst sick person in the world. I'm whiny. I'm emotional. I'm horrible company.

The one bright thing is that Chef is the master at pampering me--especially when sick. He cooks whatever I want. Offers to make trips to get orange juice and soup. He's fabulous. Even when I'm not.

So now I'm signing off from the couch! Wish me luck getting better.

I'm A Virtual Slacker. . .but not so much in real life

It's sad that Chef looked at me last night as he checked my blog (which he frequently does) and said "You haven't blogged this MONTH."And sadly, he's right. Not because I don't have anything to say. But mostly just not the energy to say it.

Then I looked at my facebook profile and realized that I've not been super active on there either. That's pretty bad considering I can update status and all that using my phone. I just haven't.

However, it's been a nice month. On Sunday, Chef and I went to see Daniel Tosh. In case you don't watch Comedy Central, he's got a genius show called Tosh.0. It's brilliant, he's funny and the stand up was a good time. The only thing that would've made the show better. . .okay two things: 1) not having to cram onto a bar stool because the place was sold out and 2) not having to hold my pee for the last 30 minutes of his set while laughing my butt off. It's hard enough to hold my pee under regular circumstances, but that was just too much.

Other than jamming three seasons of The Tudors into the last 6 days, I've been working. As usual. This time of year is crazy and we all bust ass until the end of our fiscal year on June 30th. Between pushing to that, my entertainment for the night just unveiled itself in the form of the glass of red wine Chef handed me and the new litter boxes with doors we just put out. You know your cats are large if you get the "extra giant" sized boxes. It'll be interesting to see who will be the first to break in the litter boxes. I guess interesting is actually a relative term. . .

Sometimes Politics Make Me Sad

Today for work I went to the Tennessee Legislature. The American Heart Association is a part of the Tennessee Obesity Task Force (we're against obesity, for the record). Today was the task force's day on the Hill.

Seeing politics in action fascinates and saddens me. I'd never lobbied for anything before I worked for the AHA and I kind of wish I had seen the process in action in my home state of Indiana just to see the differences. Nonetheless, it makes me both more cognizant of who I'm electing and frustrated with politicians. Not the process so much, but the people in it.

Just like politics and religion are taboo to talk about in mixed company, I feel both are the same in another aspect. Democracy and religion are both perfect ideas. When you factor in the human element, they become a little more muddled--but also more beautiful in their imperfections.

Let me explain--at least on the democracy front. Today I watched our state's commissioner of health give a very eloquent synopsis of the state of obesity, how Tennessee fares on the front (poorly, by the way), and the bills going before the House that might impact Tennessee's obese adults and kids. She testified directly in front of a representative with a liter bottle of Mountain Dew. It was kind of humorous.

The other thing that bothered me was the the lawmakers didn't know the laws they had passed. I realize that A LOT of laws are debated and even passed in the House or the Senate, but I really expected that those that were signed in to law would at least be remembered. Clearly that wasn't the case as one representative was lamenting the fact that there was no required Physical Education in schools. A few years ago the issue was voted on and it was made that90 minutes per week of physical activity was required--not PE. PE is guided by trained teachers. Physical activity is not. Some schools were counting passing periods for their students to get to the 90 minutes. I think I was more upset because requiring PE is up for vote this year.

But all of this makes me realize that I can't hear this stuff without wanting to debate it. I have a hard time being able to play the game of politics. Which is why I am better left to voicing my opinion--either with my vote or my persuasive abilities. And why I encourage everyone else to too.

I've got a case of the slightly foaming at the mouth

In a typical year, I would be suffering on this Monday morning with a basketball hangover. I would have bleary eyes, too much pizza and the need to clap my hands together and say "Let's get fired up!" repeatedly throughout the day.

You see normally I would be suffering from a case of March Madness. However, this year's Madness has not hit me so deeply. I can't say that I'm not affected at all. I did sit in a parking lot between meetings and listen to Murray State hit the game-winning shot against Vanderbilt. And I do have a tendency to flip over from my regularly scheduled program at commercials to check scores incessantly.

And I know how I'm doing in my bracket (poorly, by the way). I do root for the underdog unless they're playing a Big 10 team and the my loyaltly lies with my conference. However, the tournament takes on a slightly less thrilling endeavor when you're team's out of it. Being a Hoosier fan, it's not many years of my life that my alma mater has failed to make the tournament. At one time, they had the second longest tourney streak (behind Arizona then. Now not so much for either team).

So for me, March Madness is kind of March Sadness. However, it's not nearly the sadness that hit me after the Superbowl. I still can't even talk about that one.

Soon NBC Will be Show Crazy Guys

I thought I was alone until my friend Julie commented on it too. What the hell is up with the programmers at TLC? With Jon & Kate Plus 8 off the air, have they tapped out their creativity? Not enough ridiculously large families to follow with TV cameras?

In case you haven't seen them, TLC is launching two new shows: Addicted and Hoarding. Aka a crappy rip off of A&E's wildly successful Intervention and Hoarders. Watching the promos makes me think back to the movie Coming to America. The part where Cleo McDowell (played by John Amos) explains the difference between his restaurant McDowell's and McDonald's ("They use a sesame seed bun. We use a poppy seed bun. See?"). TLC is using poppy seed buns.

I mean, unless Jeff Van Vondern is telling me my family loves me like crazy, it's just not worth it. Besides, I know that Chef loves me enough to know that if it's the off-brand Interventionists coming to talk to me, I'd totally scoff and demand Ken Seeley show up before getting help.

And if I'm expected to clean up my house, then it better be a clinical specialist in hoarding that helps me and not some generic specialist that wanted some attention on TLC.

Am I alone here? I'd be ripping on NBC if they suddenly green lit a show about Chicago Ad Agency workers in the 60s and called it "Crazy Guys" or "Ad Dudes". It's just so uncreative. I mean, it's not like there aren't other topics to do on reality shows. I think non-profits and the crazy things people say to people who work there could fill at least a couple seasons just for Nashville. For example, the American Heart Association (where I work) has to have a line on our answering service that says "If you're experiencing the warning signs of a heart attack, please hang up and dial 911." Our front desk has also had to walk someone over the one block to emergency room because they were having chest pains. That's one episode right there!

I'm just saying. . .

I Don't Mind Driving Any More

I had to head up to Rivergate this weekend to run an errand. Normally this type of trip (about 20 minutes away) would've taken a prayer and enough shaking to have my ovaries turned upside down. Now it's not so bad. In fact, with a radio, cruise control and smooth rides, I actually liked it. I am looking forward to warmer weather and rolling the windows down with music blaring as I roll.

I even got Chef to take a ride with me to Walgreen's. It's actually a good thing, because for the next couple of weeks to come, I'll be riding back and forth to Murfreesboro (aka The Boro). I'm covering the area until I get the position filled that covers the area. It's those things that I forgot about when I was longing for management experience. But in the end, I just think of how grateful I'll be when the position is filled again. And I think about how much better I understand things now. Not the strategy, but actual execution.

So, riding around in my new car has lost none of its appeal. I hope I still think so after 47 more payments.

Perhaps This Will be the Official End of J. Lo

Following in the illustrious foot steps of Britney Spears, Jennifer Lopez is guest starring on How I Met Your Mother this week as a love interest for Neil Patrick Harris. There are so many things that confuse me about that sentence that I don't even know where to start. . . but I'll try.

Surely appearing as a guest star on a CBS sitcom (and I'm using the "com" pretty liberally here) will be enough to finish off a dying career of a star who should've remained in 1999, right? I mean, aside from whoring out her children when they're older and recording a duet with an even older and more aging pop star, this is the last call on J. Lo, right?? Can't we just all agree to that?

And then please explain to me how Neil Patrick Harris is a sex symbol and a chick magnet on that show. I realize it's not based in reality, but even before he came out of the closet, I don't even think the chick who played Wanda on Doogie Howser ever felt the attraction to him.

I don't get CBS at all. Then again, I'm not into procedural detective shows that are only like a decade old. It's got to be 20 years old and feature S. Epatha Merkerson for me to take notice.

So I'll guess I'll just watch more Tosh.0 (did I mention how excited I am to see Daniel Tosh and his casual jackets in person in April??) and hold my breath that Maid in Manhattan 2: Cleaning the Mean Streets doesn't get greenlit.

This is What It's Like to Have a Life

This week has been hectic. Every week is hectic. And I've had about the same amount of work to do. And I still feel like I could work 24 hours a day and still not get caught up.

But this week I had a life. I didn't spend every night at the office until 7 or crank up the computer at home at night . . .at least not every night. Instead, I did a lot of things with Chef, and for the most part it was time better invested.

On Wednesday, he and I went to a Scotch tasting. The thing I learned most is that I'm not a big fan of scotch. It was pretty good Scotch, according to other people there, but mostly it was nice to get out in public with Chef on a weeknight and have fun. We were with others, but also mostly a couple because the majority of people there were several decades older than we are. We both left knowing that we'll be going to more tastings in the future (hopefully in the wine and bourbon arenas).

Then last night not only did I go to boot camp and writers group, but when I got home because I didn't have to work on Friday, I got to hang out with Chef until well after midnight, catching up on the Must See TV comedies that I'd missed while at writers group, having some beer and being together.

Today, I continued the self-pampering by sleeping in WAY longer than I normally would, getting a manicure, going to lunch and seeing the BODIES exhibit with Chef. It has been nice to have some time to feel normal. It makes me want more. So I know that I have to carve out more time for myself in the future (more manicures are now a given) and push back on things that can eat up my time for now real reason.

I've got to get a backbone and know that I'm not being selfish, but acting in self-preservation.